If you know yourself well (and most of us begin to understand ourselves better as we get older), it will be easier for you to know when it’s right to go back and try something else. Talking to your friends or family about what you want, or finding a good therapist with whom you can discuss these issues, can be an essential source of this kind of self-knowledge.
In addition, it’s important to remember to be kind to yourself when you’re going through a stressful time. Not everyone finds the right life partner, creates an artistic masterpiece or finds a successful company before the age of 30. If you’re hard on yourself in this way—expecting too much of yourself and feeling stuck—try to exercise more self-compassion.
Don’t expect perfection. You’re allowed to make mistakes. Take careful note of the aspects of your choices that you can control, as well as those you can’t—and don’t blame yourself for not getting everything absolutely right. Rather, when you do make a decision, try to accept and gain comfort with the act of stepping purposefully into the unknown, even as you acknowledge that uncertainty is a part of living.
Instead of berating yourself about making the “right decision” every time, just try to make the decision as well as you possibly can, using all of the information and resources available—and then, afterward, live with the outcome as naturally as possible, knowing that your deciding process was a good one.
The Transamerica Center for Health Studies. (June, 2016). Millennial Survey: Young Adults’ Healthcare Reality. Retrieved from https://www.transamericacenterforhealthstudies.org/health-care-research/2016-millennials-survey-highlights Brigham, T. (2019, July 2). I’ve been a ‘millennial therapist’ for more than 5 years—and this is their No. 1 complaint. Retrieved from https://www.cnbc.com/2019/07/02/a-millennial-therapist-brings-up-the-biggest-complaint-they-bring-up-in-therapy.html Court, E. (2016, October 19). These therapists specialize in the unique mental problems of millennials. Retrieved from https://www.marketwatch.com/story/these-days-millennial-therapists-need-some-counseling-themselves-2016-09-30 Dimock, M. (2019, January 17). Defining generations: Where Millennials end and Generation Z begins. Retrieved from https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2019/01/17/where-millennials-end-and-generation-z-begins/ Drexler, P. (2019, March 1). Millennials Are the Therapy Generation. Retrieved from https://www.wsj.com/articles/millennials-are-the-therapy-generation-11551452286 Hoffower, H. (2019, April 8). Nearly one-third of millennials are worse off than they thought they’d be 10 years ago. Retrieved from https://www.businessinsider.com/personal-finance/millennials-financially-worse-off-building-wealth-delay-2019-4 Wong, B. (2017, November 14). The 6 Things Millennials Bring Up The Most In Therapy. Retrieved from https://www.huffpost.com/entry/millennial-therapy-issues_n_5a0620f2e4b01d21c83e84d2
Written By Loren Soeiro Originally Published In Psychology Today