Once couples can see the negative cycle and acknowledge their fearful emotions, they can begin a new pattern together without pursue-withdraw.
Knowing why your man shuts down emotionally will go a very long way in getting you to a position where you can both improve your emotional intelligence and heal from your negative cycles.
I hope you also get that you’re not alone. There are many couples out there who are tired of their partner withdrawing and shutting down emotionally in their relationships.
By taking the steps you need, and enlisting the help of a trusted therapist if you feel you can’t do it on your own, your pursuit will soften, and your withdrawing partner will listen and respond to you without shutting down emotionally.
He’ll no longer just be in the room. But he’ll be present in the conversation. He’ll be emotionally intelligent, just the way you need him to be.
Written by Michael W. Regier, PhD Originally appeared in Yourtango