Healthy relationships aren’t contained in cages, but in freedom, in adventure, in wide open spaces and deep places. Toxic relationships are confined to darkness, bondage, damaging limitations, and future-stealing mindsets of laziness and passivity.
Enabling a toxic person means becoming trapped with them. This means that when you enable someone by not speaking truth into their life, by compromising your moral standards, and by allowing them to continue in toxicity without changing, you’re not really doing anything except becoming trapped with them. Before you know it, you’ll be looking through the bars of a toxic cage, wondering how in the world you got there.
Loving a toxic person means creating freedom for both yourself and the person in need. This means that instead of allowing the toxicity to trap both of you, you take the keys you’ve been given, open the cage, and pull the other person out. This won’t happen unless you’re willing to play the role of a love warrior, valiantly clinging on to the life-giving principles of love’s character and never letting go or giving in to the enabling attitude.
You can create freedom for yourself and the toxic person and cultivate a healthy relationship by allowing the TRUTH to be your foundation, always. Toxic relationships allow for lies, small and big, and often crumble due to a web of lies that became unable to be contained. The TRUTH is what sets us free; free from all toxicity.
So, ask yourself this question in regards to your relationships: are you loving, or enabling? Do you allow for dishonesty in any measure, or do you hold your relationships to the standard of truth always? What toxicity in your relationships needs to be faced with the truth today in order to create freedom for both you and the other person?
Remember, the enabling attitude will always think of SELF first – what’s easier on you, what benefits you better, how you can watch your own back.
The loving attitude will always think of OTHERS first – what’s better for the other person, how you can watch their back, and what you can do to release them from anything toxic in their lives – including your own toxicity. Choose to face any measure of toxicity in your relationships today with the loving truth, and see how your relationships come back to life and grow deeper roots!
– Gavi, your Advocate for Healthy Relationships