Life After Abuse: 7 Hidden Truths To Help You Rebuild Yourself

7. You have to deal with a host of naive, insensitive, self-righteous, but mostly well-meaning people.

Everyone who hasn’t lived through an abusive relationship has answers—and questions—for you, especially if they read something on the Internet. And anyone who has been through one, or knows someone who has, listens—quietly and patiently.

It’s hard enough to share your truth with yourself (see #1), but to share it with people who don’t get it or think they know how to solve your problems is frustrating and painful. When someone says, “Come on. You’re still young.

You have your whole life in front of you,” you don’t want to be rude and say, “Yes, but I’m stinging from the loss of the 15 years I squandered.” But bad advice from good people is still bad advice.

This is why it’s so important to find communities of survivors, to talk to people who have experienced the same things you have. It is also crucial to choose carefully the people with whom you share your truth and only do so with those you can trust fully and you know will not use it to hurt you.

Written by Thomas G. Fiffer
Originally appeared in The Good Men Project

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7 Hidden Truths About Life After Abuse
Life After Abuse: 7 Hidden Truths To Help You Rebuild Yourself

7 Hidden Truths About Life After Abuse
Life After Abuse: 7 Hidden Truths To Help You Rebuild Yourself

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