Thoughts on Work:
1. I’m not good enough at work, I often worry that I’m going to get fired.
2. My anxiety makes me feel like whenever my boss wants to talk to me it’s a bad thing, even when it turns out to be nothing big, or a “way to go!” kind of chat.
3. I’m not a good employee, I take too many days off to manage my anxiety, and it makes me feel like a failure.
4. I don’t know how I’m going to get through this work event, there are so many people, I’m going to make a fool out of myself.
5. Your work (and by extension, you) are not good enough.
6. You are an impostor. In grad school and after, whenever at a professional conference or similar setting, I would be beset by an overwhelming feeling of my own impostor-hood. I didn’t deserve to be there, I was merely coasting on a thin sheet of lies of my own smarts and it was bound to crack.
Thoughts On Life:
1. I feel like there is no future for me.
2. My anxiety always makes me feel like something will go wrong, even if my life is going really, really well.
3. The worst will be so much worse than you can imagine.
4. You are alone. No matter how many friends I have, I worry about that deep-seated alone-ness.
5. I just don’t think there will come a day where I feel normal or even close to it. My anxiety will take over one way or another. I just don’t think I’ll ever feel 100% okay.
Written By Nikki Rutledge Originally Appeared In Thought Catalog