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About The Author
James America
James America is a passionate blogger and fitness enthusiast. James loves to reach out to people by writing interesting and informative blogs and articles on spirituality, astrology, lifestyle, introversion, along with quotes, thoughts, memes, etc. Loves reading, writing, workout, football, music, movies, and traveling.
why its hard, damn hard to let go of someone who always cause you pain everyday??
The minds journal, my deepest question…. What's your current status??? And what's your worst fear at present???
Urvashi Goja It is a question. Each week, there is something which disheartens. It does not help I live with depression and P.T.S.D. (non-combat related). It is difficult to fight the daily fight of breathing when there is so much which makes some question what this world is coming to and why does it seem so very difficult to feel hopeful and inspired in the wake of so much sorrow.
Ashley M. Hill I agree with you 100%, thanks for writing back !
Ashish Simon There seems to be never a quota for dogs and if so, how do you produce a dog out of the union of two humans? Hmmmmm.
it was just a thought. I realized later that this was a personal page, not a group. I'm not a hater in any way… it's all good. it will lead to an interesting discussion, and hopefully stay on point. 🙂 I always have questions (like the initial post that I made here) it's just the way I think.
You are quite welcome. I hope you are able to depart for the US or any place where you can either use your education in terms of starting something on your own, or obtaining an advanced degree so that you can help others. You are almost there, you just need to now prepare, plan and go after the next step! Success is within your grasp!! Keep moving, if only in asking, doing some research, obtaining information from schools and programs and applying directly. You are going after not only to work a job, but establish a career/profession. Return and show how others can also do the same. Fulfill your mission! Be Well.
Someone said it like this…
"#26. Start taking full accountability for your own life. – Own your choices and mistakes, and be willing to take the necessary steps to improve upon them. Either you take accountability for your life or someone else will. And when they do, you’ll become a slave to their ideas and dreams instead of a pioneer of your own. You are the only one who can directly control the outcome of your life. And no, it won’t always be easy. Every person has a stack of obstacles in front of them. But you must take accountability for your situation and overcome these obstacles. Choosing not to is choosing a lifetime of mere existence."
Just a personal opinion, but I do believe that you (and only you) are in control of what happens to you. No one else is responsoble.
The Minds Journal
Thank you for that! That's exactly what I was trying to get at. Thank you for clarifying my floundering attempt at what you expressed so eloquently. Much love to you! ❤️
Maybe it seems llike a good idea because it is a good idea. Stop over thinking, relax and let the good stuff happen
Why do I love the wrong men?
Be patient and you will meet the right man.
Love has everything to do with it….it is what we seek viscerally our whole lives…love is a feeling, an action, a sacrifice, a loss, a goal…….?
What of those moral issues set by the church? Unwed mom's who were condemned and forced to give-up their babies..is it morally right to judge a person that way? I feel that if i am honest with what i feel, doing right for others, respecting them even more than myself..but i earn my keep for being a sex worker. Am i still morally bankrupt?..I am just setting an example here because I grew-up with different sets of values. The one set by the church and the other one is a code on how to behave in a society. That's why i have this questions..things that i'm was afraid to ask as a growing-up girl..Am i different, as mom would say?
The Minds Journal
Wow! This is empowering…especially for us women. Fabiana Zeitter comes to mind..she's all this.
He is already with this girl..He dumped me like a shit for his reason that I cheated him ..hmmm but I swear I never cheated him till this moment..I don't want to be an option so I let him go..I forgive him to have a peace in my heart…
May b he realises he you are too good for him and he can't handle that. So just to make you get out of him, he must demonstrate as if he is cheating which ideally he may not. Might be as killing for him as it for you if you think the love was real!
Self love cannot be selfish. It is a way to balance the world and everything. Imagine a self loving person, who takes care of his/her wants and is confident enough, needs no validation and approval. and then when she feels love for someone, how lucky can get human be. Will she have to expect anything from love ? chances are she is giver more and less a receiver. She has her things in place and love is for giving selflessly.
Terry D. Pickron
Love is a many splendored thing..
Hahaha The Lettermen said.
Why does this seem like a good idea ?- doesn't Minds Journal realize that these posts just instigate the lowest form of responses, among a few gems?
did not really think this would happen, but yes it did happen.
it's sad. we all have our own views, makes no one right or wrong. each one here is right in his/her own situation and perspective.
Corwin, haters will hate. Can't really do anything about it. They will poke nose in soemthing good also, doesn't mean we should stop sharing.
unstable mind makes……
selfish thoughts thats the reason
i accept some of us are lairs,cheaters,some women cheat too….like man did
Why is there so much hate in this world?
misunderstanding of religion,skin tone,nationality,politicians………………
Saravana Kumar M
This is what I don't understand. Sometimes I do wonder about the existence of God..can he teach us to love more? After all we are all alike..we all bleed. Oh! The whys are killing me!
This question surprises me as well. Everyone needs love then why can't they just accept it rather than holding grudges and spreading hatredness 🙁
Charmi Gogri ..exactly my thoughts..
It keeps us grounded Terry D. Pickron. Love kills us and heals us.
why have we given specific names for everything? like, why is a fork a fork, why is a knife a knife? why is blanket a blanket? what if a blanket is actually a knife? what if we've got our names for everything all mixed up, what if everything we've ever learned is false, and we're all going in the wrong direction? what if there's no hope left for this world…
You are cute Jenny. For some questions, even google doesn't have the answers. Hope exists as long as you have faith in your heart.
Words are but symbols of symbols, and so are twice removed from reality. We use words to sustain the belief that we are separate, when in reality we are all one. Go beyond words. Whatever a rose is called it is still a rose. It is what it is.
Thank you, both of you 🙂
oh god, this is awesome 😀 :3 😛
Because the quota for dogs was full?
Jaisy the only difference between shit and this reply is that this has some high IQ
As if it's in my hands Ashley 🙁
I never listen to someones words unless it meets with their actions by showing you how they feel.
Because that person doesn't have good values or a good moral sense. Find someone who will respect you and values you.
“I want burning, burning….” What is that burning?
Rumi <3 🙂
Aissatou Sunjata,thank you for your input…
Correct I understand y they does this but there is no way to stop them?
Blanquita Arana I have tried, I haven't been that successful, I must be honest, I give up on the acting quickly.. actually, that's an advice given by some aquaintances, eventually it's like having to tolerate negativeness, yet, on the contarary it's an empathic way of learning to connect with our surroundings.. Thanks for sympathizing 🙂
Jennifer Sebits That's exactly what happens with my love life, I constantly keep making the ''wrong'' decisions and end up ''healing'' and contaminated by their monsters inside.. Frienship wise, I have very few friends, and seems weird but all is stages, with time they leave too.. Like if they'd need me no more…
Learn how to forgive yourself…. it comes with an ah-ha moment of purpose and direction. At least that is my experience,
pain gives you the capacity to develop depth. wisdom takes experience so you can gain some here. Integrity, though, is the only personal barrier. Some people laugh at pain.
Believe we each are born for a reason, mission if you will excuse the imagery. We are meant to find out what that purpose is and many of us may not ever find it. We are also born in order to learn something about ourselves. When you think about all the cells, all the eggs which could have created others, there is no coincidence that we were created. Now, if the idea of a purpose is not the reason, the idea of our becoming those who leave something behind in our passing is an idea. It is not how much we accumulate, not how much we gain while on earth, it is once we are dead what others will say about us in their encounter with us along our journeys. We can only hope they say they were touched, or learned something or smile, or laugh at having encountered us while here.
Stop getting yourself into fucked up situations.
I think it may begin with some level of sadness, but it does not have to stay that way. Some things which start out with pain can end up being something for which you are satisfied, or see the reason why you had to learn the lesson. In the knowledge, you become wise and deep and do not regret the pain.
Social Sciences almost guarantees you have to get an advanced degree. In US, there is nothing can be done with it on a Bachelor level. In US, if interested, you must apply for a Master's level education and might even have to do a Doctorate. You can in some cased be a student worker at the institution earning an advanced degree in your department. Also, there is employment perhaps in the institution in which you are accepted. Also, employment can be part of the program itself in some cases.
y man cheat even he loves u so much?
Why is there so much hate in the world? why cant we just coexist peacefully?
If you're not divided you can't be ruled and politicians cannot let that happen. The politicians will divide you and keep you bust fighting eachother so they can control you and rule over you. The hate we have is seeded in us. we hate a religion or race or sex even though we didn't have any bad experience with them just because you are told to hate them. you see its a long set game and its not really easy to undo this
selfish thoughts thats the reason
Why did i born a HUMAN ?
You are blessed to be born a human. You have been blessed with intelligence and so many other qualities. Use wisely
: You were born a human so to serve your Creator, the one and true God.
Pain makes you wise and deep. It does not necessarily make you sad.
What do you think?
Pain makes you many things. Stronger,wiser,deeper, but it does make you sad especially if it's been inflicted by people you care about or inflicted upon people you care about.
True. But we have the choice to either be like the 'coffee bean' or become the hard 'boiled egg'. I think you get it.
what can I do with a degree of bachelor of social sciences?I can't get a job with the degree here in South Africa,apparently have to do post-graduation qualification in order to specialize,but I want to know does this also apply in other countries?if I have a degree in social sciences can I get a job?even if I'm still furthering my studies?
Not getting a job? create one. you can either waste your time seeking a job which you're sure of not getting or begin from a single step and make everything on your own. just ne brave enough to try it. the worst that can happen is you might face some loss but you have masters degree and knowledge and now all you need is passion and courage to try something new on your own. don't hold yourself back and go create your path. good luck!
How to deal with the situation when you know you are fucked up between reality and your dreams. As sometimes things aren't in destiny and we have to learn to walk away with that, can't really decide if we should give up or try harder. Any suggestions for me ?
Don't give up! EVER. what's reality without our hopes and dreams? Dismally depressing and barely worth living, naturally. Never give up on your dreams because you'll be giving up on yourself and the right to have the things in life that you truly deserve. Be true to you and follow those dreams wherever they might take you, regardless of what your current reality happens to be. Your reality can always be changed by the decisions you choose to make each and everyday. Choose to make your reality resemble your greatest dreams as closely as possible and dare to be happy.
This makes some real sense, thanks Jennifer ! Let me just soak in all what you said.
Jennifer Sebits ,I adore parrots with large vocabularies,but do not seek their advice…
walk away? where? Sometimes your dream are too weired and too good to come true and sometimes they are mere wishes in your subconcious mind which requires a little effort in any case first you need to understand weather that dream makes you a better person or person and if it helps in making the world a better best, If it does you're lucky to have it. in the pursuit of your dream even if you fail you will have lived the life of your dreams. Refrain from living upto the societial norms and seeking conformation for your every action. just make sure you're okay with it and it doesn't harm anyone and go ahead with it. life is not straight forward learn to drift where you need to and yes play it cool.
Shamir Alam. Beautifully said. ❤️
Jennifer Sebits ,wow…a true intellectual…you lose again…bye,bye…
Terry D. Pickron. Just taking notes from you, my friend. You get back what you put out, remember. Case in point with my tendency to act like a brainless asshole when confronted by one. You don't see me acting like this towards anyone else here but you, do you? Go take a VERY HARD look in the mirror, my friend because you're inviting in what you're handing out, Hon. Haha. ADIOS, AMIGO!
I've been there, and learned that keeping an open mind to change allows new options in. Sometimes i went with the flow, and discovered even better things that i didn't know will come my way. Serendipity.. ❤
I gave an answer so here is my question: now that you're finally seeing who you really are…what are the steps to take to let go of who you have been?
…the first step is wanting to change,the second step is forgiveness for your self and for others,all else will follow with a continued effort on your part…peace…
I don't believe the answer is letting go of who you once were. That person is still a part of you and was an integral and necessary stepping stone for the change that took place within yourself. Accept that person and keep them close to you, always. They deserve as much of your love as the new and improved version does. Most importantly, they're apart of your whole and without them, you wouldn't be this person that you are now. Acceptance and forgiveness ARE the key, just as Terry D. Pickron mentioned above.
Yes, acceptance and embrace the old self…that will be the final stage of the cycle. But I feel I'm in the middle of it…the old ways, habits, thoughts get in my way sometimes and they make me fall into old behavior patterns. I guess I got to keep practicing/DOING the new until they become my new automatic natural reactions. Thank you for your answers! 🙂
I'm in a similar place, so I know exactly what you mean. My final catalyst for change will be taking place when I shed old environments, discard negative individuals that I'm hanging onto for various reasons, surround myself with a new, positive support group, begin integrating myself back into society once again and reprogram all my old, negative ways of thinking about myself.
Why terrorist are so cruel how can they kill innocent people and themselves for no reason 🙁
Sadly, they have their "raisons" in their mind…we just cannot even begin to understand those "reasons" or even their way of reasoning. Hope this helps…
Everyone has a past, It's not wise to judge the book just by the cover it showcases. Something in the past might have shaken then so badly that they grow up to become such.. There could be any kind of obligation involved 🙁 Having said that, I'm not speaking in their favour, just giving a broader perspective
fear, hate, politics, money and power. 1) Terrorists are brainwashed by those with evil intensions and made to believe their actions are the will of god. 2) suppose today in an attempt to kill few terrorist a nation indiscriminatly bombs a country or any part of it, now if a innocent family is killed and somehow only the father or brother survives, the will seek revenge and get to any extent as they have nothing to lose. 3) money, it can buy almost anything, even lives. 4) politics- this shit is deep. and similat reasons. They do have brains but a dysfunctioning one. they are just beasts in human clothings
How to improve my attitude, I'm very solitary yet not lonely… I am attracted by vibes and for that have few friends and loose them easily, always been told I'm intolerable…
…sounds cool to me…if you are happy ignore the judgements of others…choose your own path…peace…if you are happy and want to remain so,ignore the judgement of others…
How to improve my attitude, I'm very solitary yet not lonely… I am attracted by vibes but always told I'm intolerable…
Hang out with people who put out more positive vibes. I have the same problem and my bad attitude always stems from all the negative vibes that I interact with most frequently. My problem is that I find those people with that type of vibe the most intriguing. I get lost in their ridiculous games and take on all their chaotic confusion into myself and act accordingly.
I have a very STRONG attitude…it's comes from being so upfront and honest. I was out doing errands with my 16 year old and she said I was in my RUDE MOOD and I was embarrassing her. She challenged me to be sarcastically nice the rest of the day…she said people wouldn't notice my sarcasm because they didn't know me. So I accepted. I was extra nice and sweet to everyone the rest of the day….and I noticed that I got better results and achieved my errand with more success because of my (+) attitude and I didn't embarrass my daughter. Yes I learned a lesson that day (: hope this helps.
That is true
…what has Love got to do with it…?…
It?
The Minds Journal ,it is anything…love and peace…
The Minds Journal ,it's just a ''second-hand'' emotion…
who needs a heart … when a heart can be broken
Pat Trexler ,thank you…peace…
It has nothing to do with it. Love is a devine form of beauty which we can only carry within our hearts. The moment it's out, it dies.
Love has everything to do with it… Self-love that is. All love stems from within. Love is the foundation of all strength. Love heals everything and is the answer to everything when it comes from inside. Once we begin to think love is just another "second-hand emotion", we've become truly lost. Sadly, this explains the hopeless state of the world today. Love has taken a back seat to money, power and greed. There's no room for love to grow there and so our world is spinning out of control in a destructive, downward spiral straight into hell.
Jennifer Sebits ,but isn't self-love selfish and egotistical…please get on one side of the fence or the other…Love despises hypocracy…and do you understand the phrase…''comedy relief ''…so many words with no meaning…peace…or not…
I don't go with self love as well. I feel more comfortable with self-acceptance. Be honest with yourself and accept your own faults, nobody is perfect anyway!
Then, if you feel that someone is special, you will accept them whole-heartedly. They will always feel home with you.
Alaa Ghaffar Hussein ,yes…simple,direct,to the point,and usefull without a thousand meaningless words,thank you…respect…
love has everything to do with everything… even the proverbial "it"… if a person would love another person freely, anything can happen
Rachel Reese ,I agree…my comment was more in humour than anything…peace…it's a song…
Rachel Reese ( don't be too open. Men like some challenge, some mystery.)
"A woman is nothing but a mystery. And she looses a beautiful part of her being if she becomes too needy, too available, too attainable. She has to remain a muse. A mirage. An illusion. You may try to explore her, but will never find her. Never claim her. Never complete her. She will remain forever something you will always crave for. Desire for. That is the beauty of being a woman. Beauty of being mystical. Beauty of being a mystery. Beauty of being ethereal. Beauty of being a longing. Beauty of being herself! "
~ Urvashi Goja
Well said.
I woman shouldn't have to be anything other then who or what she wants to be. That shouldn't include the need to be a "beautiful mystery" or anything else for every man to figure out. Women aren't born to be toys for the men of the world to play with until they get bored with them and toss them into the trash for the next shiny, little thing that catches their eye. The mystery of a woman lies within the courage to be herself in the face of whatever this world throws at her. Pretending to be something you're not just to maintain an air of mystery so that you might be desirable in the eyes of others, isn't honoring yourself or your true beauty. Sometimes, owning the self confidence and ferocity to be wide open and EXACTLY who you are in front of the world, is the "beautiful mystery" that not many own that's attracting others to you like moths to a brightly, burning flame. Not many in this world dare greatly by refusing to be anything other then real in this life. And btw… There's so much to some people, it doesn't matter how much of themselves they choose to openly share. For everything that's being brought forth into the light for others to see, there's a million more things that they're keeping to themselves. Some puzzles have too many pieces to put together that easily.
Jennifer Sebits well said
It's a part of why I never like such women. Personally, I like being treated in the same way I treat others; clearly and openly.
Jennifer Sebits YES <3
all of this is so beautiful… thank you! <3
I never said…woman ' needs' to do anything. I said being a mystery, even unto herself is the essence of femininity. Men are more simple. Woman more complex due to her high EQ. That is why knowing a woman completely is very difficult. And you should not force yourself to be open an readable… just to prove that you are as friendly and all. Be like a blossom who opens up slowly to the sun, enjoying herself the process as will the person watching her.
An enigmatic person is not only a mystery to the world, her mystique lies in the fact that she finds herself equally appealing.
~ Urvashi Goja
I wasn't taking about pretense …but essense of femininity.
How can you feel hopeful and inspired for living when each week there are so many instances which make you feel so hopeless?
Aissatou Sunjata… Is this a statement or a question?
What is morality?
Morality is a set of ideals representing right from wrong determined by each unique individual. One person's idea of morality isn't necessarily right for the next. It's what helps each person lay down their own personal parameters in regards to what feels right or wrong for them in life. This isn't the same for any one person nor should it be. Life would be a lot more simple if people would just accept that their version of morales isn't set in stone or necessarily true for the rest of the world.
Jennifer, I believe though there are areas which are clearly non-negotiable. We don't steal from each other, we don't murder each other, we don't do certain things to each other and only those who are the most severe in not being humane or possessing a conscious can dare cross the line. People like to throw religion up as the gauge, but I believe there are certain morals which are innate and part of being human. The rest we learn from our environment, guidance.
A personal code of ethics
Ashley, yes, I agree. Other than being a sociopath, innately we have a sense of those codes of ethics whether we refuse to adhere to them or acknowledge and follow them, they do exist.
Aissatou Sunjata
I agree with you and I was actually pondering that part of it when I wrote that post. I chose not to address the collective human ideal of life's most basic moralities for a very good reason. Of coarse, all of those basic morals involve not hurting your fellow neighbor or creature in any form or manner. Most decent human beings consider this to be apart of their basic set of morals but not all people. There's plenty of people that have little or no compunction when it comes to hurting or even killing another for their own personal gain, obviously. War is one excellent example of this. That's the only reason I didn't include what I consider to be the basics of human morality.
I was told, once someone puts you in their "friend zone" you can never get out…. how do you avoid the friend zone at all? I am always the buddy, pal, friend…
…is this a ''trick'' question…do not be friendly…peace…
I answered you. Check it out 🙂
Best to start with friendship and it could lead to a relationship.
Agree with Kimi. Real one's will turn back no matter which planet or world you live in, Fake one's just goes away no matter how hard you try. Everyone get's what they deserve, so need not worry. Just keep giving your best shots and tries so that when you look back, there are no regrets that you did not try to remove the friend zone tag !
Wonderful idea.
I agree too 🙂