He belly laughed for a good amount of time before he could even speak. And when he did speak, he said,
“What is on your FACE?!”
Now that’s a true friend. Someone who will tell you like it is. Someone who isn’t afraid to hurt your feelings, your pride, or your manhood.
Someone who tells you the truth even when you’re trying to do something for a good cause.
Why don’t people say what they really think or feel? Why do we avoid communicating what we actually want to say?
MY THEORY? LACK OF CONNECTION.
When you’re truly connected to someone, you’re vulnerable. But vulnerability poses a threat. When you’re vulnerable, you’re open to getting hurt. You’re intentionally leaving yourself open to possible harm.
But unless we become vulnerable, we’ll never truly feel connected. And if we’re not connected, we’ll never actually say or do what we think.
I tell my wife everything. Absolutely everything. All my victories and shortcomings are shared with her. She knows the best of me and the worst of me. And vice versa.
If I intentionally kept things from her, I would damage the connection. And of all the people I need to stay vulnerable with, it’s my spouse.
And the beautiful thing about vulnerability and connection is the freedom that results. You can only be free when you’re willing to be vulnerable.
Yes, you’ll probably get hurt sometimes. But you’ll also experience the deepest, most meaningful relationships of your life.
So the next time you see someone growing a moustache or doing something different, don’t avoid it or pretend to like it.
Written by DEREK HARVEY
Originally appeared in Derek Harvey
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