13 Ways To Keep The Thrill In Your Relationship

Ways To Keep The Thrill In Your Relationship

12. Abide by the 5-to-1 rule

While you may think giving your partner a compliment will counter some negative “feedback” you provide, think again. The “magic ratio” is not 1:1, but rather 5:1.

This means that in order to have overall positive feelings about your relationship, you need to have at least five positive encounters (actions, statements) for every negative one. The take-home? Spend more time telling and showing your partner what you love and appreciate about them, laugh more, and spend more fun time together. When you do, the tough times are easier to get through.

13. Drop the perfectionism

Stop expecting your partner (or yourself) to be perfect. Drop the all-or-nothing attitude—“You didn’t ask me about my presentation today, so you don’t care about me” or “You didn’t want to have sex last night so you don’t find me attractive.”

Stop personalizing and generalizing your partner’s actions. Instead, accept where they are. Be assertive by communicating your needs and wants in a respectful manner. Forgive your partner. And move on.

Above all, be hopeful. Relationships, like life, have ups and downs. If you are on a downward slope right now, have faith: Things can get better. Put some time, energy, and love into your relationship. Focus on being the best partner you can be. Get help if you need it. And see the positive in your partner and your relationship.

For daily inspiration follow Dr. E on Instagram: DrELombardo https://www.instagram.com/drelombardo/ 


Written By Elizabeth Lombardo 
Originally Appeared In Elizabeth Lombardo 
Ways To Keep The Thrill In Your Relationship Pin
13 Ways To Keep The Thrill In Your Relationship
Pages: 1 2 3
nv-author-image

Elizabeth Lombardo Ph.D.

Dr. Lombardo is a Licensed Practicing Psychologist with an MS in Physical Therapy and a Ph.D. in psychology who combines research findings, real-life stories, and humor to provide actionable tips that individuals can benefit from immediately. Considered Shaquille O’Neal’s “Head coach for Happiness,” Lombardo is on a mission to free people from the stress of perfectionism caused by their own inner critics. She is considered the country's most widely interviewed celebrity psychologist, with hundreds of radio and TV appearances on shows like Dr. Oz, The TODAY Show, Steve Harvey, CNN, Fox Business News, and others, and she has been quoted in media outlets including The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, Money Magazine, Forbes, Women’s Health, and Cosmopolitan. Her own articles can frequently be found in SUCCESS, Fast Company, Entrepreneur, Better Homes & Gardens, and other publications. Her latest book, Better Than Perfect: 7 Strategies to Crush Your Inner Critic and Create a Life You Love, is meant to help anyone suffering from conditional self-worth or perfectionism turn down their critic’s voice, turn up their self-confidence, and gain essential skills to flourish in work, health, relationships, and life.View Author posts