I am finally learning to be at Home with myself

 March 18, 2019

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They say, Home is where the Heart is..

I never knew what it really meant or how that felt like

Until ;

I, woke up  on my bed in my family home few days after my mom passed away

and I had this deep sense of loneliness a feeling of being so empty and alone

in spite of being at “home” where I have lived for years.

It,was at that moment I realized home is not a physical space but of people you make memories with,spending time with people you love.Home could be at that mountain top surrounded by nature and you felt this perfect sense of peace or waking up in a new city in a hotel room overlooking the sky, to the sound of raindrops and at that moment you feel content and perfectly at ease.Home could be a long bus ride to anywhere and you don’t want the ride to end because you have your favorite podcast or music on.

I always told myself one day I will be done packing my belongings in a suitcase and I will find a place to settle and call it a home but I am beginning to realize that Home is where ever I am at peace. It has nothing to do with material ties but more to do with people that you create memories with, home is where you are the most peaceful,relaxed  and your heart, mind,soul and spirit are all moving in one rhythm. Home is where you want time to stand still and bottle those moments,smell, laughter, noise forever.

I am learning each day that this moment I have; is a gift and rather than waiting for that one day where I will finally find a place to call Home. I am taking time to stop and breath, to absorb and soak all that is around me. I am learning to pace myself and take time to feel that soft wind brushing against my skin,the smell of coffee, sinking my teeth into that juicy apple and just being thankful for my taste buds,I take time now to pause and look up at the sky, take time to watch the sunset and sunrise and the moon.I, no longer yearn for a Home in a physical sense because I am learning to come home to myself everyday.

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