How We Fool Ourselves Into Thinking We Need To Stay With Toxic Partners

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3. I Love Them

You cannot love someone you resent having to give that love to. Repeat this to yourself over and over again till you’re sure that you’ll never forget it. Don’t think that you’ll be crowned as a savior for giving up your own desires because you think that you can pick this person up and fix them. They might not even think that they’re in need of being put back together. You don’t love this person. You’re in love with the idea that your love can make another person whole again. Pride wants you to be the hero of this story you’ve written in your head. Healthy relationships are ones in which both partners are open with each other and who support each other through everything. There’s no competition as to who is more mentally stable than the other.




 

4. They Love Me

Nip this idea in the bud before it takes over in your mind. A person who knows that they’re causing you pain but still repeat their actions over and over again is not someone who loves you and they’re not likely to at any point. Even if they think they love you, it doesn’t matter if that doesn’t come across in their attitude towards you. Sometimes your partner might just be with you because they like how the attention you give them makes them feel and not because of any particular feeling towards you. They like having a hold on you and you like to think of yourself as a martyr to the cause of bringing them back to what you believe is the light. Relationships only work when both partners have something meaningful to contribute to each other. You’re not supposed to be trying to one-up each other in everything.

 

5. I’m In A Relationship

No, you’re not. This is not what a relationship looks like. When the two of you are stuck in a seemingly never-ending battle between your individual needs and what you both feel like you’re forced to do for each other, it is really not a relationship. To be in one, both of you need to be on level ground. You need to be able to find the happiness you’re looking for in each other. Healthy love isn’t a breeding ground for resentment and hate. When you experience it, you’ll know what it is.
So, now that you know the signs to watch out for, it is up to you to stay or leave. Remember that, in a relationship, there are only two of you and no one else will be able to get you out if you aren’t willing to help yourself.




 

Related Video: 8 Things To Expect When You Break Up With A Narcissist

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