You have exactly what you need
Not everyone can have everything—we can’t all be smart and beautiful and talented because then none of those things would exist. If the world was full of geniuses, there would be no such thing as a genius. There would just be one state of being.
What we all need to realize is that we were given a unique toolbox to be the person we’re meant to be. And there is no one else like you in the entire world, just like there are no two snowflakes that are exactly the same (a fact that I still find staggering, and how do you ever prove that concretely? But I digress…).
We all have different gifts; that’s what makes the world run as it does. Some people are beautiful, some are brainy, some are funny, some are serious, some are outgoing, some are introverted, some can sing, some can paint, some can write, some are tall, some are short, some are thin, some are curvy, and some are a combination of a few of these things, but no one can be all of these things. It’s just not possible and it doesn’t exist.
Figuring out what to do with my life was easy for me because I’m not someone who is good at a million things. If anything, I’m mediocre at a lot of things and really good at one thing. I can write—it’s easy for me and I think I’m pretty good at it. But my whole life I struggled with wishing I was better at other things.
I wished I was good at math (I still need my fingers to help me add, no joke!), wished I was good artist (painting just looks so fun!), wished I could play an instrument, and wished I was better at certain sports. But as I’ve gotten older I realize that I’m not good at those things because I don’t need to be good at those things! That’s not my purpose in life. My purpose is to write and share insights, and that’s what I do.
We can’t be everything. This was a big struggle for me, and such a relief when I really realized and internalized it.
Choose your reactions
Jealousy is an emotion, and like other emotions, it can be controlled. You can choose to not give in to your jealous feelings. You can choose to be happy with what you have instead of wishing you had what someone else does. That’s how you can stop being jealous.
When you feel that green monster being roused, you have two options. You can either feed it with thoughts such as, “Why can’t I look like that/have that/be that?” and then feel really bad about your life. Or you can say, “Wow, that’s awesome for that person, good for them,” and go about your life.
If they have something you want, then use it as inspiration to get it—maybe inspiration to work out more, eat healthier, or pursue your passions. The point is, you can choose what thoughts to engage with. If you go down a negative path, then the thoughts will keep flooding you and will keep wedging themselves in this empty space, making it even larger and making you feel even worse.