Do you often wonder how to make friends as an introvert with social anxiety? Yes, it can be challenging, but not impossible. Read on to know more!
Making friends can be a challenge for anyone, but it can be especially difficult for introverts with social anxiety.
As an introvert with anxiety issues, the thought of putting yourself out there and meeting new people can be daunting, and the fear of rejection can be overwhelming, even crippling.
However, making friends is essential for our well-being and happiness. So, let’s explore some practical tips and strategies that introvert people with social anxiety can use to make friends and build lasting connections.
But before that, for the uninitiated, let’s see what it means to be an introvert and what the heck is social anxiety! Along the way, we will also answer the question that many struggle to answer, and that is; why does an introvert need to be alone so frequently?
Read: What Is Introvert Personality?
What Is Introvert Personality Type and How To Make Friends If You Are An Introvert With Social Anxiety
Introvert people are those individuals who have a distinct personality type that can be characterized by the following traits:
- a preference for solitary activities and introspection
- a tendency to avoid socializing and external stimulation
- being reserved, reflective, and thoughtful
- feeling drained or overwhelmed when compelled to engage in social interactions for extended periods of time
- introverts need time alone or be in quiet environments to recharge their energy after such social exposure
It is important to note that introversion is not the same as shyness or social anxiety, which are separate issues that can affect anyone regardless of personality type.
Introverts can be confident, assertive, and successful in social situations when they feel comfortable and engaged, while individuals with social anxiety may struggle with social interactions of any kind.
How to make friends if you are an introvert with anxiety? Yeah, that’s a toughie! Social anxiety is a debilitating mental health condition that comes with an intense fear of being judged by others.
People with social anxiety often feel gripped by overwhelming fear and stress in situations that involve social interaction or performance, such as:
- speaking in public
- meeting new people
- or attending social events
This fearful anticipation can be so overpowering that it interferes with a person’s ability to be functional in everyday life, causing them to avoid or endure social situations with great distress.
Social anxiety can also lead to physical symptoms such as:
- Sweating
- Trembling
- Rapid heartbeat
- Nausea
- Looking flushed
However, if you are plagued by the thought of how to meet people as an introvert with social anxiety, know that there is hope! Social anxiety is a treatable condition. Treatment typically involves therapy, medication, or a combination of both.
And if you work with a professional mental health care provider with expertise in both introversion and social anxiety, you can overcome the barriers that keep you from living a fulfilling life.
You will be able to see your characteristics as your uniqueness and not a disability. But it is a long process and you have to be patient and keep at it!
Meanwhile, we have come up with effective, practical, and actionable inputs that you can adopt to expedite the process. Are curious to know how can an introvert make friends if they have anxiety issues? Keep reading!
How To Make Friends As An Introvert With Social Anxiety
Let’s see how can an introvert make friends, overcoming the barrier of social anxiety.
1. Know Yourself
You have to know yourself first. Read on introvert personality type and understand your limitations, boundaries, and preferences. Identify the areas that you can work on and be more flexible and also those areas that are off-limits and out of the negotiation.
Can you take a phone call after work or every communication has to be through texts? Do you have to bail on every movie night plan? Can you make an exception for a potential friend?
2. Understand Your Anxiety
The first step in overcoming social anxiety is to understand it. Social anxiety is an intense fear of being judged or evaluated negatively by others.
It is often accompanied by physical symptoms such as sweating, trembling, and blushing. Introverts with social anxiety may also struggle with initiating conversations, joining groups, or attending social events.
This is where you will need help and tools from your mental health service provider. They can show you how you might cope in overwhelming situations, how you can ground yourself, and be open to some social interactions.
Read What Happens When Introverts Don’t Get Alone Time?
3. Be Mindful
One way to cope with social anxiety as an introvert is to practice mindfulness. Mindfulness is all about bringing your focus to the present moment without judgment.
Mindfulness is experiencing every moment. It is the practice of being fully present in every moment and being engaged in the current activities, thoughts, and situations, without judgment or distraction.
It involves paying attention to our thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations, as well as our surroundings, with a sense of curiosity and openness.
Mindfulness has been shown to have a wide range of benefits, including reducing stress, improving cognitive function, and enhancing well-being.
By cultivating mindfulness, anyone can learn to better manage their thoughts and emotions, develop greater clarity and focus, and deepen their connection to themselves and others.
There are many ways to practice mindfulness, such as meditation, breathing exercises, or simply paying close attention to daily activities. With regular practice, mindfulness can become a natural and enriching part of one’s daily life.
By focusing on the present moment, you can reduce the intensity of your anxiety and improve your ability to cope with social situations.
4. Ground Yourself
Grounding techniques are useful tools to manage anxiety and stress by bringing a person’s attention to the present moment and their immediate surroundings. One effective grounding technique is the “5-4-3-2-1” exercise.
The 5-4-3-2-1 coping technique is a grounding exercise that can help manage anxiety and stress by bringing a person’s attention to their immediate surroundings. Here are the steps to follow:
- Identify and name five things that you can see around you. These can be objects, people, or anything else in your environment. For example, you might say “I see a red chair, a white wall, a green plant, a brown book, and a blue pen.”
- Identify and name four things that you can touch around you. These can be textures, surfaces, or anything else that you can physically touch. For example, you might say “I can touch a soft cushion, a hard table surface, a rough carpet, and a smooth wall.”
- Identify and name three things that you can hear around you. These can be sounds, such as people talking, music, or nature sounds. For example, you might say “I can hear birds chirping, a car passing by, and the sound of my breath.”
- Identify and name two things that you can smell around you. These can be scents, such as food, perfume, or natural smells. For example, you might say “I can smell fresh flowers and the scent of coffee.”
- Identify and name one thing that you can taste. This can be a taste in your mouth, or you can choose to eat or drink something to experience a taste. For example, you might say “I can taste the sweetness of a piece of candy.”
By following the 5-4-3-2-1 technique, you bring your attention to your immediate surroundings, which helps to reduce stress and anxiety. This technique can be used anywhere and anytime and can be modified to include different senses or variations that work for you.
5. Take Baby Steps
Making friends can be overwhelming for introverts with social anxiety. It is essential to take small steps and gradually build up your social skills.
Start by engaging in small talk with people you meet, such as your colleagues or neighbors. Ask open-ended questions and show a genuine interest in their lives. This will help you to build rapport and establish a connection with them.
6. Join Support Groups
How to meet people as an introvert? Joining groups is an excellent way to meet like-minded people and build connections. Consider joining a book club, a hiking group, or a hobby group.
These groups provide a structured environment that makes it easier for introverts with social anxiety to engage with others. It also gives you a shared interest to discuss and provides a platform to build relationships on.
You can look up community or support groups exclusively for people with social anxiety or introverted tendencies on the internet.
You will meet people who go through the same challenges as you and who have similar preferences and behavioral traits. You might make some great friends there too!
However, always be e safe and remember to protect your privacy while interacting with strangers.
7. Attend Social Events
Attending social events can be daunting for introverts with social anxiety. However, it is an excellent opportunity to meet new people and build connections. How do introverts make friends?
Start by attending small events and gradually work your way up to larger events. You can start with familiar groups of relatives or friends, where you will know everyone, and later try parties or mixers where you will bump into strangers.
It is also important to remember that everyone is nervous when attending social events, and you are not alone.
Try to say “hi” to the person who smiles or looks at you in a friendly way. When someone makes small talk, give them a smile and nod when they speak. Gradually try to break the ice and introduce yourself to someone who grabs your attention.
8. Mind Your (Body) Language
Body language plays a crucial role in making friends as it helps to establish a sense of trust, understanding, and rapport between individuals.
When we meet someone for the first time, we often subconsciously interpret their body language to form a first impression, and this impression can greatly influence whether we are drawn to the person or not.
By using friendly body language, such as smiling, making eye contact, and using open gestures, we can signal to others that we are approachable, warm, and interested in getting to know them.
Additionally, being mindful of our own body language can help us to convey our intentions and feelings more clearly, reducing the chances of misunderstandings and conflict. Overall, body language is a powerful tool for building connections and creating meaningful friendships.
Here are some pointers if you’re still wrestling with the question “how do introverts make friends”.
- Smile genuinely and naturally
- Make eye contact, but not too intensely or for too long
- Use open and relaxed gestures, such as uncrossed arms and legs
- Lean in slightly towards the person you’re speaking with
- Nod your head occasionally to show you’re actively listening
- Use mirroring to match the other person’s body language and movements
- Avoid fidgeting or other nervous behaviors
- Keep your tone of voice friendly and welcoming
- Stand or sit up straight, with good posture
- Avoid invading the other person’s personal space
- Use appropriate facial expressions, such as raising your eyebrows in surprise or furrowing your brow in concern
- Use appropriate touches, such as a handshake or pat on the back, if appropriate in the situation and culture.
Read: Your Body Language Doesn’t Lie. 40+ Body Language Signs And Cues To Strip Down Someone’s Personality
9. Always Be Yourself
How to make friends as an introvert with social anxiety? One of the most important things to remember is to be yourself. It can be tempting to try to fit in or be someone you are not, but this will only lead to feelings of discomfort and dissatisfaction.
It is essential to be true to yourself and let your personality shine through. People will appreciate your authenticity, and it will help you to build genuine connections.
10. Embrace Rejection
Being yourself includes being okay with rejections. Rejection is an inevitable part of life, and it is essential to learn how to handle it. Introverts with social anxiety may fear rejection and avoid social situations to avoid the possibility of being rejected.
However, rejection is not a reflection of your worth as a person. It is essential to understand that not everyone will like you, and that is okay. Embrace rejection as an opportunity to learn and grow, and use it as motivation to continue to put yourself out there.
11. Take Care Of Yourself
Making friends and building connections can be emotionally exhausting for introverts with social anxiety. It is essential to practice self-care to maintain your mental and emotional well-being.
Take breaks when you need them, engage in activities that bring you joy and prioritize your mental and emotional health.
12. Introverts and Alone Time
Never ever feel bad for your need to disconnect once in a while to recharge your batteries. Introverts need time alone. Solitude gives you the perfect opportunity to organize your thoughts, introspect, process overwhelming emotions, and calm your racing mind.
Some “me time” will help you in your journey of forming deep and meaningful connections. You can use this quiet retreat to learn about yourself and your personality, understand your trigger points, and contemplate your communication style and how you show up in the world.
If you feel annoyed or irritated by someone, this time alone can also help you rethink your judgment and see their point of view.
However, remember that introverts and alone time is often misunderstood. People might think you are being rude or you’re not interested in being in contact with them.
Even if you tell them that you are an introverted person, many people, especially extroverts might wonder the age-old question; why does an introvert need to be alone???!!!!
So, try to clearly communicate to them your need to be on your own for some time and promise them you’ll be in touch soon again.
Read: 6 Simple Steps To Recharge Your Spiritual Battery And Restore Your Vitality
Your Vibe Will Attract Your Tribe
Making friends can be challenging for introverts with social anxiety, but it is essential for everyone to have a support group or people to fall back on.
Friends make our lives interesting and more fulfilling. They support us through thick and thin and become our chosen family. Friends offer us motivation when the future seems too bleak.
And there is absolutely no reason why you can’t have such fulfilling connections. You too can make friends can with your unique personality and behavioral traits.
You just need to find the right kind of people who will see you as you are and cherish you as a friend and companion.
So, how to find such people? How to make friends as an introvert with social anxiety?
By understanding your anxiety issues and personality traits, taking small steps toward your dream life, joining peer support groups, attending social events, being yourself, being mindful, being grounded, embracing rejection, practicing self-care, taking time to recharge yourself, and working on your body language!
This way, you will be able to put yourself out there, meet potential friends, and build genuine connections with like-minded people.
Remember that making friends is a journey, and it is imperative to be patient and kind to yourself along the way.
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