Psychologists say that there are even some benefits of building relationships without the pressure of the idea of a long-term partnership. Building a long-term relationship usually means you would want to hold on to it. It’s only natural. We feel joy and happiness every time we are with someone and we want to have another dose of it over and over again. To prolong it almost no matter what. That would lead to compromises, concessions, etc. And in the event of a marriage or moving together, the pressure will become even greater. Bit by bit, little by little you’ll make more compromises with yourself to keep everything on track. And that is not very healthy psychologically speaking. This pressure might really mess up your life, your current and your future relationships.
So why not skip this thing altogether? Or at least leave it for later and enjoy what you have? Dating and building relationships without the pressure of trying to make it a solid thing can be much better for everybody. In a worst-case scenario, you’ll have your fun and go your own way. And in a best-case scenario, you’ll find someone who you have chemistry with and who you will eventually move in with or marry. I know that it’s hard for some people to just let go of the idea of being very serious about relationships. But you might find out that actually achieving this goal is much easier if you don’t pursue it. I know, right? Well, it’s not that counterintuitive. This is one of those “the more you try the harder it gets” type of a situation. There are a lot, and I mean A LOT of couples whos “happily ever after” started as just a bit of sympathy or fooling around and then moved to something much much more. It’s quite possible that in those cases people’s intuition worked better than their rational brains. Don’t underestimate the power of subconsciousness and your intuition. Maybe the attraction you can’t rationally explain will be the best thing that will happen to you.
Of course, all those advice are also not the rules that are set in stone. Every life, every relationship is a bit different even if there are some commonalities between them. Something that works in relationships your BFFs have could be an absolute horror show for you and vice versa. The best way to deal with all the advice of this kind is to listen to them, analyze them, think what works for you and what doesn’t and then make some adjustments to those recommendations. Hopefully, you’ll be able to find the unique solution that will be the best for you and maybe others.
And if you see that it’s not working… Well, you might hold on to the relationship while the fun is lasting or maybe it’s time for you to find someone else. Just be honest with yourself, your needs and desires and do what’s better for you. Probably the only thing you shouldn’t do is staying in a relationship just of a sheer habit and hope that everything will eventually become the way you imagine your perfect relationship. You might be really disappointed in the end and suffer needlessly.