My ex was once more the entire focus of my world. I loved him, tried to help him, rescue him, change him. That made him feel good about himself again. For a while.
That’s how the cycle of abuse works. Both needing the other to fulfill insecurities.
Neither of us could do this. The internal well we both had were bottomless buckets. Deep-seated needs are insatiable.
Round and round the abuse cycle went.
Feeling great, feeling down, feeling great again, being abused again. It takes its toll on your self-esteem.
I hit rock bottom. Then the lightbulb went off in my head:
This isn’t love
It’s not. It’s an unhealthy codependency.
I couldn’t agree more with this article. It describes what I went through to a tee.
It’s a dysfunctional dance based on each dancing the correct unhealthy steps.
If you’re in an abusive relationship or have experienced one in the past, I urge you to read it:
Are you in love with someone who hurts you? Trapped in an abusive or dysfunctional cycle? Let me know in the comments below.
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