Holding Back The Years

Holding Back The Years

A lot of people stay in bad relationships. This is fact. What’s also a fact is that a lot of people stay in bad relationships because of the amount of time they’ve put into their relationship.

This is dumb.

Do you know what the worst justification for staying in a relationship is?

“We’ve been together so long, I don’t want to start over.”

Oy vey.

I’ll never understand this logic for the life of me. Think about this, if you invest your money with an investment banker who constantly loses you money, you wouldn’t think twice about chucking the money sucker. So now imagine that your investment banker is not only losing you money but not even showing up when he’s supposed to be there and calling you names or not even calling you at all or throwing pennies at you while singing songs like, “Tell Me What That Thing Smell Like.”

Not only is your investment banker costing you hard earned money, he’s also making you feel like crap in the process.

You wouldn’t stay with that banker, would you?

However, we’ll stay with a person who treats us like shit because we’re comfortable with our bad decision because it beats the alternative of potentially finding another bad apple and having to look at the past 3 years as a loss – if we even find somebody else at all.

So we stay with people we have no business being with in the first place for much longer than we should in the second place despite every sign that it’s a bad decision in the third place but because we’re lazy in the fourth place so we’ll settle for fifth.

Of Jack Daniels that is, because you hate your relationship but your dumb ass is looking at your relationship in terms that make no sense. Relationships aren’t investments. They’re the intersection of two people headed the same direction with shared interests that might render cute kids. You don’t invest time in a relationship. Sure you spend a lot of time in your relationship with your significant other, but you’re actually investing yourself and your soul. If your ass is actually investing time in your relationship, then it becomes a business arrangement and I’m guessing you don’t have an MBA.

I know that time is important to people. Hell, I hate people who waste my time with the passion of seven Paris Hilton sex tapes. But if the only good thing I can say about my relationship is that it’s lasted for two years, then there’s a good chance I’ve got quarters in my ass because I’m playing myself.

Remove the quarter, people. Remove the quarter.

Take heed.



I started blogging in the summer of 2008 as a way to have an alternative outlet for my creativity. My writing career was at a standstill and I was dying for an audience (any writer who tells you they don’t want an audience is lying). Friends had been suggesting, for years, that I write about dating. I’ve always been a prolific dater and had plenty of dating stories to share, so I went with it. And blogging seemed like a great way to find an audience. I am also a co-founder of Loveawake dating siteView Author posts