4. Guide your child to think through the outcome of his Choices.
Think of it as A debrief–a non-judgmental review of the situation.
Ask what he thinks will happen if he gives up. What about if he gives it another try? What does he think will help him reach his goal to master whatever skill he is working on?
Avoid the temptation to try to make him change his behavior by cajoling, bribing/rewarding, or shaming (“Big boys ride two-wheelers”; “You’ll never succeed if you don’t keep trying”.) This just gives children fodder to become more defensive.
5. Ask your child how he would like to proceed.
“Would you like to keep practicing or do you want to take a break? It’s up to you.” This sends the message that the control is in his hands which makes it more likely he will persevere, at some point. Forcing the issue often leads to kids becoming defensive and digging in their heels further.
This article is part of a series on understanding and supporting highly sensitive children. You can check out other installments in this series, here.
Written by: Claire Lerner
Originally appeared on: Lerner Child Development
Republished with permission