21. My kids asked me what it was like to be a mom.
So, I woke them up at 3 a.m. demanding to know where my lucky sock was.
22. What’s the fastest land mammal?
A toddler that’s been asked, “What’s in your mouth?”
23. How many moms does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, obviously, and she has to do it or else it won’t get done.
24. Why did the baby beans give their mom a sweater?
She was feeling a bit chilly.
25. There is a legend that if you take a shower and scream “Mom” three times, a nice lady appears with the towel you forgot.
26. She believed she could, and she almost did…
But then someone asked her repeatedly for a snack and she totally lost track of what she was doing.
27. Why do Mothers have to have two visits to the optometrist? Because they also have eyes in the back of their head.
28. 1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes are your regular clothes.
29. Showering as a mom should be an Olympic sport: Everyone’s yelling your name, you have to beat the clock, and you rarely win a medal.
Related: 10 Indulgent Ideas For Mother’s Day
30. Why do Mothers have to have two visits to the optometrist? Because they also have eyes in the back of their head.
31. I love when the kids tell me they’re bored. As if the lady standing in front of a sink full of dirty dishes is where you go to get ideas about how to have a good time.
32. Why do Mothers have to have two visits to the optometrist? Because they also have eyes in the back of their head.
33. Where do baby Transformers come from? Opti-mom Prime.
34. “After a long day, my favorite thing is to think of something for dinner that everyone will eat.” —No mother, ever
35. Motherhood is like a fairy tale but in reverse. You start out in a beautiful ball gown and end up in stained rags cleaning up after little people.
36. Being a mother of a teenager is finally understanding why some animals eat their young.
37. Science teacher: “When is the boiling point reached?”
Student: “When my mother sees my report card!”
38. Baby snake: “Mommy, are we poisonous?”
Mommy snake: “Yes, son. Why?”
Baby snake: “I just bit my tongue!”
39. Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Omelet
Omelet who?
Omelet Mommy sleep in today.
40. Mom: The amazing ability to hear a sneeze through closed doors, in the middle of the night, three bedrooms away… While daddy snores next to you.
41. What are the three quickest ways to spread a rumor? The internet, the telephone, and informing your mom.
42. It just occurred to me that the majority of my diet is made up of the foods that my kid didn’t finish.” —Carrie Underwood
Related: 10 Reasons Why Stay-At-Home Moms Have The Most Stressful Jobs
So, which one of these funny mom jokes were your and your mom’s favorite? Let us know what you and your amazing mom thought about these funny mother’s day jokes and feel free to share them with your family and friends, and make them laugh some more!
