The search for Happiness can be long and hard if you have no idea what exactly you are looking for.
I am always reminded that happiness is relative, though never understood why. There are many of us today who will understand why we question this and wonder how it is ever possible especially when our lives are so full of chaos. So we search for what is Happiness and how it is possible when we are faced with so much in our daily life.
I know within the world of myself I have so much happened and not all of it is just chaos. Each day is a challenge to work through and still manage to find that little bit of happiness. Finding happiness amidst the chaos is just one step forward into true happiness. It is certainly not the fairy tales we watch on tv or read about.
We can only find happiness through witnessing our progression in life and the small things that make up each day. Sometimes we even have to face a day where happiness is not so evident and chaos seems to rule, however, this is the beauty of happiness itself, it comes with the good and the bad, the happy and the sad. Happiness is found within, all it takes is to acknowledge it and allow it to flow in all that is true.
This, though is not an easy task, there is often so much happening within our lives that we have trouble seeing past the chaos and the troubles we face each day that happiness seems such a distant emotion we have forgotten to express. There is, however, light beyond the darkness, and it will be a work in progress when it comes to discovering how to feel happiness.
We first have to work on ourselves as a whole, through the turmoil and chaos listening to our heart and mind. We must acknowledge these before we try to work on happiness, otherwise, it will only become a forced emotion and thus turning into more chaos and turmoil. This is what I call “Fake Happiness”.
My journey into self-discovery has been about learning about who I am and understanding that a lot of my trauma, turmoil, and chaos has not always been a direct result of my actions.
Rather they have been put on me to handle and deal with. As they say “Not your fault“. And this is my biggest vice, or rather had been. I spent a lot of my time trying to force happiness and smile that it became fake. I appeared happy outwardly, however it was eating at me from within. I still often feel empty and I am still learning how to be happy and what it means to be happy.
At one time I felt that happiness meant you had to be big smiles, laughing, ultra talkative, moving about with pep and keeping this going all day every day. Now, I realize happiness isn’t all about the outward expression, it’s what you feel and acknowledges within.
Out of all that I have learned, I have felt my heart grow again, I have discovered there is such thing as happiness and I find it in the little things. Seeing my Children smile each day, in my Husband as he walks through the door after a hard days work, with the cuddles I get from my pets and most importantly in myself in the realization that I have accomplished something new. My problems have not gone away, I still need to work on those, I have just realized that they don’t rule my life.
As a reader, there will be some things that will resonate with you, and some parts that you will dismiss. This I understand, my aim is to tell my story, to show that there is hope, and with time you too can find your happiness.