When I am talking to clients about initiating a break up, the #1 reason they often don’t want to break up with someone is because they don’t want to start dating again.
The prospect of going back online, of having random conversations, and even more random dates, having to dress up and be charming and kiss a lot of frogs with no certainty that they will find the right person, is completely daunting. And it pisses them off.
If you are angry that you have to start dating again, I get it. It is exhausting. But I can promise you that, unless you put yourself out there in some way, you won’t find the person you have been looking for.
And they are out there, waiting for you. I promise.
5. Other people’s opinions.
Be honest. Are your friends trashing talking your ex? Are they saying that he was never good enough for you? Is your mother saying that she never liked him, your dad saying that she wasn’t pretty enough? Are your co-workers happy that you aren’t dating her anymore because you are now free to go out with them after work?
Other people’s opinions can play a very large part in why you are feeling angry after a break up, even if it was mutual.
People like to stoke fires, to create drama, to trash talk people who might have caused someone they love pain. As a result, they might say things that will rile you up a bit, that might make you question your ex’s actions and motivations and the things that you did to encourage it.
Spending any time at all rehashing what happened can take you right down that anger trail, even if you know that the break up was the best thing that could have happened to you.
So, stop listening to others who trash mouth your ex or your relationship. Better yet, shut them down and move on.
Feeling angry after a break up, even if it was mutual, is not unusual.
Emotions are interesting things and surprise us at every turn. Who would have thought that the emotion that manifested after a mutual break up would be anger?
Do you have unanswered questions or things that were left unsaid? Are you disappointed that the relationship ended and are your friends dissing you? Are you looking out into the world of dating with despair?
All of those things can lead to anger but know that the anger will pass. It will pass quicker if you take stock of the things that I discussed above but it will, with time, fade into something that you don’t have to think about any more.
Life will go on. And you will be happy. I promise!
Originally published in letyourdreamsbegin.com