9 Essential Qualities For A Spouse: Pre-Marriage Checklist

Qualities Spouse PreMarriage Checklist

Empowered by a strong sense of duty, each of us is drawn to behave in ways that are normally motivated by affection. We can still speak kindly, act graciously, show concern and thoughtfulness. A strong sense of duty provides a bulwark of steadiness against the vagaries of emotion.

What’s more, by keeping us on course it also smooth’s the way for repairing the hurts that caused those feelings of affection to first recede.

Related: 8 Important Conversations Before Marriage

9. Courage   

Each of us, at one time or another, must face risks that involve potential heartache, setbacks, uncertainties, and anxiety. When these moments are met with a lack of courage, one is likely to be swept up by fear. Wise decisions are seldom made on the basis of anxiety. Choices in life that are based on a desire to avoid that which one is afraid of will frequently lead to deep regret.

9 Essential Qualities For A Spouse: Pre-Marriage Checklist
Essential Qualities For A Spouse

What’s more, decisions made on the basis of minimizing fear will end up robbing you of the opportunity to grow stronger by facing your anxieties. No soldier became a better warrior by running from battle. No athlete became better in his or her sport by avoiding competition.

Courage will not eliminate fear, but it will overpower fear and keep it from controlling you in the big moments of life.

A full and deeply lived life requires courage. It is an essential quality for your spouse to possess. Do not look for someone who is without fear – that is simply a foolish individual. But do search for someone who refuses to be controlled by fear.


There are an infinite number of characteristics that attract people to their soulmate. Some of these qualities are more important than others. The nine described above are essential. They are like the foundation of a house. Stability is had when these attributes are present.

Of course, there are many other qualities that can, and should, be looked for in a husband or wife. But these will differ from the fundamental qualities we’ve just examined in that they are specific to your unique personality and personal preferences.  

Examples of these types of qualities include whether someone is romantic, creative, spontaneous, sports-minded, etc. If the nine qualities we’ve just discussed are similar to a home’s foundation, these other qualities are akin to a home’s architectural style (colonial, Mediterranean, contemporary, and so forth).

Both sorts of characteristics are important to consider for a happy marriage. The foundational qualities, however, are essential to get right if you wish to enjoy a relationship that continues to mature over the course of your lifetime.

Written By Forrest Talley
Originally Appeared In Forrest Talley

Building and having a happy marriage takes a lot of work, and when you and your spouse do the work together, it’s a winning recipe. Always choose to spend your life with someone who embodies these qualities, as this will ensure that you will get to live a peaceful and content life with them.

Qualities Spouse PreMarriage Checklist Pin
9 Essential Qualities For A Spouse: Pre-Marriage Checklist
Scroll to Top