You’re ready for a soul-based relationship once you’ve done some inner work and you know yourself, and you feel whole.
It doesn’t’ mean that you have to be perfect 24/7. It’s more about recognizing your shadow side and through it consciously rather than expecting that someone else will fix it for you.
You turn from a little insecure self into a grown-up person who knows all their aspects and takes full responsibility for them. Because your age has very little to do with the fact if you’re emotionally and mentally mature or not.
Your deepest shadow parts can’t disappear by themselves without you actively participating. And your partner’s responsibility is not to save you or fix you.
When you love someone with your soul:
- you always support them in their dreams
- you trust them
- you give them the freedom to be and do what they want
- you expand and grow with them without trying
- you can be your true self with them, and they can be with you
- you always wish them the best (even if that would mean they leave)
there is equality between you
- you both take care of your mess (they can help you if they want but there is no expectation on your side)
- and most importantly, you feel expanded with them as oppose to feel like you need to hide and shrink (as in fear-based relationships)
True love doesn’t hurt
Pain and hurt is also a sure sign of ego love. Because when you believe that it’s the other person who is the source of your unhappiness, you’re not in a soul-based relationship.
It’s the illusions about love that hurts.
The partner in the ego-based relationship helps you to see your own shadow so you can work on it and then become whole.
Whereas, in the soul-based relationships you both grow but not through pain but instead through awareness and being present. You also don’t have any power-battles and blaming games with each another.
In whichever relationship you’re, remember that you always get that which you need the most at any given moment. So embrace it fully and learn from your current lessons. It doesn’t mean that you have to stay in a dysfunctional relationship, sometimes part of the teaching is to leave.
You can also continue reading the 4 types of relationships from the soul’s perspective.
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Written by Sylvia Salow
Originally appeared on Sylvia Salow.com
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