Decoding Men: What He Says Vs What He Really Means

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decoding men

Decoding men can be a challenging thing, to be honest. But if you really want to understand them and their words, all you need to do is pay a little bit of attention to what they are saying and how they are saying it.

It seems to be the age-old mystery: what does he really mean when he says certain things? And why do men seem to have this whole other language that we women just canโ€™t quite understand?

John Grey shed some light on this phenomenon in his infamous book Men Are from Mars and Women Are from Venus, but now that dating has gone digital surely the rules have changed?

There seems to be this constant communication breakdown between the sexes, resulting in frustration, bad dates, and a whole lot of heartache. So to help the ladies with some basic โ€˜manslationโ€™. Hereโ€™s a list of common things a man says and what he really means.

Decoding Men: What He Says Vs. What He Really Means

1. โ€œYou look hot!โ€

What he means: I want to take you to bed or get physical with you and am not necessarily offering anything serious at the moment.

2. โ€œYou look beautifulโ€

What he means: I really like you, you have my attention.

3. โ€œI think youโ€™re really nice, butโ€ฆโ€

What he means: Iโ€™m not interested in anything right now.

4. โ€œYou have a great personality, but โ€ฆโ€

What he means: Iโ€™m not interested in or attracted to you. (Basically, if thereโ€™s a โ€˜BUTโ€™ after any sentence itโ€™s a good indication he isnโ€™t after anything serious.)

Related: 11 Types Of Men You Will Come Across When Dating Online

5. โ€œHey!โ€

What he means: If heโ€™s just sending one-word lines with no questions after or only short non-committal answers then the guy is not 100% committed to getting to know you. Move on.

6. โ€œWanna hang out?โ€

What he means: I want something casual and canโ€™t be bothered to ask you on a formal date. Heโ€™s most likely keeping his options open.

7. โ€œSorry, Iโ€™m busy, maybe another time?โ€

What he means: Itโ€™s possible he is genuinely busy, however, if he is serious about seeing you again he will organize and lock in a time with you. Otherwise, this is just an excuse not to make you a priority because he isnโ€™t wanting more.

8. โ€œItโ€™s not you itโ€™s meโ€

What he means: It is most definitely him. Either he doesnโ€™t want to hurt your feelings or face the music.

9. โ€œI just need some spaceโ€

What he means: This could mean one of two things โ€“ either he needs some time to think a few things over or he isnโ€™t interested in committing.

10. โ€œNetflix and chill?โ€

What he means: We all know what this means and where it leads to.

11. โ€œDo you want to come back to mine for a drink?โ€

What he means: Do you want to possibly make out with me on my couch?

Related: The Meaning Behind What Men Say to Women

12. โ€œI would love to see you againโ€

What he means:  He actually really wants to see you again.

13. โ€œWhat are you wearing?โ€

What he means: He pretty much wants to know if you are naked. Most of the time he wants a visual image because he has one thing on his mind.

14. โ€œI donโ€™t need helpโ€

What he means: I donโ€™t want to admit my faults or weaknesses.

15. โ€œIโ€™m just not after anything seriousโ€

What he means: I donโ€™t want a commitment right now, but Iโ€™ll take the casual part!

16. โ€œI like your hair/ dress/ shoesโ€

What he means: He is noticing the detailsโ€ฆ

17. โ€œYou have beautiful eyesโ€

What he means: He is attracted to you and probably wants to kiss you.

18. โ€œDo you want to go somewhere casual?โ€

What he means: He doesnโ€™t want to get too serious yet until he gets to know you.

Related: 5 Things Men Think About Women But Wonโ€™t Say

19. โ€œSorry, have to raincheck. Super busy. Will try to catch you another timeโ€

What he means: If he hasnโ€™t bothered to call you to cancel plans or locked in another time then this guy isnโ€™t prioritising you, probably because he doesnโ€™t want anything serious.

20. โ€œWhat ya doing now? Wanna come over?โ€(text sent at 10pm)

What he means: BOOTY CALL!

So whatโ€™s the outtake?

In general, ladies, the best way to know if he is into you or not is this: if he is you wonโ€™t have to ask yourself the question, you will just know. Men arenโ€™t as complicated as we think. Most of the time their actions will reveal their true intentions and what they say they really mean.

And if youโ€™re ever in doubt just ask them! Great communication works both ways so donโ€™t be afraid to ask a few questions and get some clear answers.


Written by Renee Slansky
Source: TheDatingDirectory.Co
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