Hi there, it`s me your future mother (and yap I know this is a little strange). I know you are probably wondering why I have to disturb you before you arrive here and even before you are planned for ( totally strange huh?). However, I just felt that I should pour my heart out to you because I know someday, I will get to read this letter out loud to you.
I do not have the first-hand experience of how it feels to hold one`s child, but one thing I am absolutely sure of is that the day you and I meet will be magical. I can already imagine the kind of relationship we will have. I have not met you yet and I do not know how long it will take before we finally meet, but I already fell in love with you. I know it sounds crazy but I can already picture your tiny feet, cute little face, and laughter.
Our meeting will feel like fireworks. Although I know I will be a nervous wreck, I mean I can not help but wonder, how will I hold you carefully without hurting your fragile little body, the thought of bathing you while you are still tiny freaks me out! What happens when you start crying uncontrollably at night and I do not have the slightest clue where you are hurting? OOhh sweet child!
And what about the shots!! Your mama here has a phobia for shots! What happens then? What happens when I have to take you to the countless doctor`s appointments to get your shots? Will I be strong enough?
All these thoughts scare me, but then I think of the joy I would have by seeing and feeling a piece of me in another little human and it overwhelms me. I know it will not be a smooth journey, and that is why am pouring out my heart to you right now. Dear sweet child, your mama is not perfect and I am not going to promise that by the time you get here I will be perfect, but you can be sure of one thing, my love for you will be perfect, I will love you more than life itself.
I will raise you the best way I know how, teach you the importance of love, respect, humility, but above all to put God first in everything you do. I want you to grow up and not only see me as your mother but also as your friend and confidant. I pray that you will not have to search for any information from the world before coming to me.
Dear sweet child, I want you to know that when you get here you will feel wanted, loved, appreciated and not once will you ever feel like you do not belong. I will teach you what it means to wear confidence as your cap, to never be afraid to speak your mind but always do it the right way.
And when the time comes and we finally meet, please forgive your mother if she gets a little bit confused and overwhelmed at the same time ( trust me, I can tell already that moment will be overwhelming). It`s not that I will be scared, but I am sure it will all be reality dawning on me. Making me realize that I will no longer be accountable for myself but that now there is someone else looking up to me to set the right example for. The weight of finally realizing that from now on someone else would be counting on me to protect them, feed them and take care of their well being. So please dear child, when you get here and find me in that situation do not get mad and forgive your mama. But I promise you one thing, I will do whatever it takes to get it right.