In this day and age, all of our emotions are running high. With the news and the lack of social interaction, the boredom, and the monotony, many people are living on the edge of insanity. When we are dating, the edge of insanity is not a good place to be.
For one of my clients, a man she had just started talking with is normally a clinically depressed person. He has been treated for it and generally has it under control. Right now, however, he is really depressed and is having a very difficult time managing it. My client feels badly, but she knows that she doesn’t want to be in a relationship with this guy the way he is.
In regular times, this man’s depression might not have reared its ugly head so quickly and so dramatically and my client might have gotten to know him and love him and understand that depression is just part of who he is.
5. Looking for commitment.
One of the most interesting things that I am seeing happening right now is that many people who are newly dating are looking for a commitment unnaturally early.
For those people who are social distancing alone, not having a partner can be especially painful. The idea that everyone else is out there quarantining with their person while they are alone, alone, alone is just too much. As a result, they seek to create a committed relationship out of something that isn’t there yet.
I have a client who has been talking to a guy for about a month. They talk on the phone daily and they have sat at least 6 feet from each other 3 times but that is it. They haven’t touched, they haven’t gone out in public, they haven’t met each other’s friends.
This morning, this guy asked my client if she would go off the dating apps, that he wants them to be in a committed relationship and that she needs to stop talking to her old boyfriend. She said ‘Wait, what?’
In the normal world, this whole scenario most likely would never have happened.
The human need to be coupled up is a significant one and especially during these difficult times. That need to connect is a big reason why dating anxiety is so prevalent and so extreme right now.
Dating is hard and dating anxiety has always a part of it but, because of coronavirus and social distancing, that anxiety is going through the roof for many people.
The new normal of dating and not knowing the future is so uncomfortable, it’s hard to follow your gut, to control emotions that are running high and manage the politics of being single make what has always been a thing fraught with stuff, something even harder.
I know that it’s hard but I would encourage you to take stock of what I have said and persevere nonetheless. This WILL be over someday and when it is, wouldn’t it be nice to find love again for the summer?
You can do it!
If you want to know more about dating anxiety during social distancing, then check out this video below: