We have set a very high standard for ourselves. We feel capable of doing things others would not even consider thinking. This we do for our close and loved ones also. We expect them to do things at a level beyond their comfort zone. Meeting expectations every time is difficult, and this does affect us in a not-so-good way.
But we expect this only from the ones we love. So basically it means that the higher the expectation from a person, the more we love them. Such expectations are mostly for having a perfect romantic relationship, wanting to have picture-perfect and everlasting love. But when with time the intimacy fades off, it makes us disheartened and pushes us to question the whole foundation of the relationship.
We feel that getting into this relationship was a huge mistake. But this just shows how much we care about the person we just questioned.
6. Bluntly Honest
Honesty is the best policy. But in this diplomatic world, we have to choose our words carefully. A neutral answer is best preferred. Unfortunately, we INFJs are too honest to convey our thoughts with softer words.
And to make the situation more complicated, we have the urge to give advice to every person seeking help. We love to analyze a situation and give suggestions.
Even when we try to be gentle, the words somehow come out harsh and rude, and judgemental, and that’s the dark side of an INFJ personality. Our intentions are pure and all we want is the best for you, but we speak more on the negative side of the situation rather than positive. We can be rude but never false.
7. Defensive Attitude
Many times people hurt you more than you can take. Some people bring you stress, pain, and depression. These people may not be bad or mean any harm to us, but facing them makes things more difficult for us.
This is when we adopt a defensive attitude. We try avoiding such people and cut them off our lives. We may stop all sorts of communication with such people. Even when it is not practically possible (like when you meet them daily at work, home, etc) we detach from them completely, both emotionally and mentally.
This is not done on purpose, and we do not do it knowingly. It is like we are on auto-pilot and all our actions are controlled by our subconscious mind.