6 Commandments Of Vulnerable Communication

Note: Vulnerable communication is not the answer to all of your problems. If you have a low self-esteem, vulnerability can drastically boost your self-esteem and decrease neediness. But if you continue to suppress yourself and see yourself as unworthy due to bad belief systems then you’ll struggle even in healthy relationships.

Individuals “who are troubled by low self-esteem might project their self-doubts onto their partners, leaving them uncertain of the constancy of their partners’ affections. As a result, occasional self-doubts or personal failures might turn into relationship insecurities.” 2

As Brene Brown highlights, true belonging in relationships only happens when we share our authentic, imperfect, and vulnerable self to our partner. The paradox is belonging can never be more than accepting yourself. When you accept yourself, you bravely ask for what you need and want. And that courage deepens your relationships with your partner and yourself.

If you want to transform conflict into material to build a stronger and more connected relationship then read Kyle Benson’s conflict blueprints here

 

References:

  1. Book: Mindwise: Why We Misunderstand What Others Think, Believe, Feel and Wantby Nocholas Epley (2014)  Pg. 183 
  2. Murray, S.L., Holmes, J., MacDonald, Ellsworth P., (1998) “Through the Looking Glass Darkly? When Self-Doubts Turn Into Relationship Insecurities. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, Vol.75, No.6, 1459-1480. 

Written by Kyle Benson
Originally appeared in Kyle Benson

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Kyle Bensonhttp://kylebenson.net/healthy-relationships
I've had the privilege of working with men and women on a wide range of relationship issues. I've helped individuals:Leave toxic relationships to find a healthy relationship that makes them feel calm, grateful for the person in their life, and deeply valued by their partner Close the emotional distance between partners so they feel deeply connected to each otherResolve relationship conflict, leading the couple to become closer and more loving than they ever thought imaginable Remove sexual anxiety to create intensely passionate and longer-lasting sexUse problems in the relationship as catalysts to help individuals grow into their highest potential (and become more awesome lovers)Our coaching sessions are tailored towards reaching solutions that improve your relationship quickly. Read more about my coaching programmes here, Relationship Coaching or Email me at [email protected]
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