Darlene Lancer, JD, LMFT

Darlene Lancer is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and an expert author on relationships and codependency. She's counseled individuals and couples for 30 years and coaches internationally. Her books and other online booksellers and her website

Are You Losing Yourself In Your Relationship? Stages of Codependency and what you can do about it

We lose ourselves gradually in small imperceptible ways. It can start with romance, when it’s normal to want to please our loved one and spend much of our time together.

5 Red Flags and Blind Spots In Dating A Narcissist

Here are some reasons why you might not recognize a narcissist:

Soulmates And Unconditional Love

Are you searching for a soul mate or unconditional love?

Denial: A Serious, Invisible Problem

Denial is serious. It’s a refusal to acknowledge truth or reality. It may be conscious but is usually unconscious. We all do it. We not only deceive ourselves, we forget, excuse, rationalize, and minimize.

Thanksgiving and Gratitude in Hard Times

Gratefulness comes more easily to some than others. There are several things we can do to develop an “Attitude of Gratitude.”

Love Bombing as a Narcissistic Attachment Style

Getting hit by a love bomb feels glorious! The lavish attention and affection seem to answer our prayers. We’ve found Mr. or Ms. Right―our soul mate; unsuspecting that we’ve been targeted by a narcissist.

Deprogramming Codependent Brainwashing

Codependency is based on false, dysfunctional beliefs that are learned from our parents and environment. Recovery entails changing those beliefs, the most damaging of which is that we’re not worthy of love and respect

Signs You Have A Toxic Parent and How To Deal With It

When we grow up with dysfunctional parenting, we may not recognize it as such. It feels familiar and normal.

Can a Narcissist Love?

Anyone who’s loved a narcissist wonder, “Does he really love me?” “Does she appreciate me?” They’re torn between their love and their pain, between staying and leaving, but can't seem to do either.