6 Shut up:
This commonly used phrase can do a lot of damage than usual. This displays that the adult is unable to respond to the child and his queries. He or she may just plain refuse the child when it comes to a query or a plea. This shutdown command can psychologically affect the child and quell his emotional well being.
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7. “You are making me crazy “:
This is an unhealthy phrase that uses guilt in a child to motivate him or her to change behavior. Our kids may be driving us crazy, but we should not verbalize this in an unedited fashion and worsen the thought process and the feeling of ownership in a child. Worse still, children feel they are the cause of the problems in others and develop low self-confidence.
8 What is wrong with you?”
This phrase typically uses shame to motivate and rid a child of his behavioral nagging. These shame-inducing phrases are a mirror of our complex moods and expectations as parents but can adversely affect a child’s comprehension.
9 “You better_____ or else!”
This phrase is a typical example that uses fear to bring about change in a child. Children can read all this pretty easily and with time, find a reason for this refrain. The problem starts when they grow up and use this go-to strategy themselves. The phrase is most likely going to erode the respect between kids and their parents.
Do you know that childhood trauma can have several negative effects? Read How Childhood Trauma Impacts our Physical, Emotional and Relational Health
When dealing with children, it makes sense to remember that they are our future and problem phrases may just boomerang on us with time. No matter what his or her guilt or problem, try to focus attention on the child and not his sermons. His behavior may be awry, but his intentions clear and therefore it is up to you to understand.
No matter what the situation, as a parent, you need to diffuse it and not verbalize abuse or say psychologically damaging things.