*Author’s Note: This is a response to an article written by Dina Strada on Elephant  Journal, 7 Types of Men to Stay Away From. It seems like Dina wrote it from her heart, and based on the reactions I read on Facebook, many women agree with her. I have imitated her style and form in an effort to show another perspective, my perspective—a man’s perspective. 

 

As men, it’s too easy to assume women are what we see on the outside.

Drawn in by her looks, a smile, we are quick to let our guard down and minimize any negative qualities. We want to believe she is kind, loving and can make a damn good sandwich.

We can usually explain why we fall. It’s usually because she’s pretty and hasn’t given us a reason not to.

It’s not surprising, then, that many men fall for the same types of woman over and over again, even if it always turns out the same way.

Complete f*cking bullsh*t.

If you stop and take an outsider’s look at your current relationship, you may realize you are in this pattern right now. The good news is, now you can predict the future!

Everyone can change, though, and who knows, maybe this time it will turn out differently. But chances are, you’re in for another heartache. Here is a short list of seven types of women I would recommend avoiding in a long-term relationship:

1. The Fixer Upper

This girl is just a few short qualities away from perfect. She hasn’t quite learned her own self-worth. Her confidence may be a little low. Self-deprecating humor is her favorite defense against the world.

But if you could just get her to see herself the way you see her!

Stop now! She is the only one in charge of her happiness and her self-esteem. She has to discover her amazingness herself. She will only see you as someone with bad judgment if you try to tell her she is better than she sees herself. Find a woman who loves herself. I promise you. She will love you harder than you can imagine.

2. The Over-Communicator

The girl is just downright annoying. She wants to tell you everything about everything. And she wants to hear it, too. This girl needs a girlfriend. Not you. She will sap all of your energy leaving nothing left for romance. Not to mention, she will kill the mystery. Half of the fun of a new relationship is the discovery. And much like exploring a new city, it is best done slowly and physically.

She will talk when she’s nervous, talk when she’s scared, talk when she’s aroused and talk when she’s lonely. And it won’t stop. It might be cute for a few dates, but as a man, we need silence sometimes. Communication is key in any relationship, but not everything has to be revealed at once. And some things are better just left alone.

You are her boyfriend, not her mother, not her best friend. Let the correct people fill those roles and you will be better at yours.