Consistently make a conscious effort to gather evidence to the contrary of what your mind has collected for such a long time. Gather evidence of women being kind, caring, honest, noble, loyal, just, and loving. More specifically, whatever themes your mind has most held on to in the past, gather evidence to the contrary of that theme. For example, if you have long believed that “all women are manipulative users who hate men”, then consciously gather evidence (in real life) of women who you see being kind, tender, honest, and loving towards men. This evidence can be gathered from real-life role models, or from people that you see in the media.
Over time, the value from this practice will throw off dividends. It will become easier to see evidence to the contrary of your old beliefs when your mind is more in the habit of seeking it out. Your mind will be less rigid, and your life (internally and externally) will be more filled with love, compassion, understanding, and trust.
Finishing With A Dash Of Tough Love
As far as the ego is concerned, it’s far easier to stay angry than it is to forgive. It’s easier to give up, check out, and stay upset with the world than it is to feel into your residual pain.
It takes courage and effort to lean into these wounds and come out with a lighter heart. But what else are you going to do with your remaining years? Let your pain win? Wrap yourself up in your metaphorical armor and close off from the world? Join the extremist ranks of the MGTOW/red pill/MRA/incel movement and hold on to the belief structure that women are inherently evil and hate men? Is that any way to live a life? It sounds like a colossal waste of energy to me.
Again, I’m not invalidating your pain. I fully believe that women have wronged you and hurt you in the past. But don’t let your ego make your pain special. Everyone has to wound from past painful events. This is just a fact of life. Horrible things happen. Unfathomable pain exists.
And yet, every day, people make the decision to let go of the stories that they carry about their pain and they find it in their hearts to move forward, by feeling into and releasing some of their emotional residue. I want today to be that day for you. Instead of identifying, for the rest of your life, as a victim of the pain you have felt at the hands of women, I want you to do your fucking work… and be bigger than your pain.
You aren’t justifying their behavior. You aren’t saying it’s okay. You’re deciding to set down your pain. You’re deciding to say yes to being with all parts of yourself. You’re letting the weight off of your shoulders and forgiving them for yourself, and for everyone you come into contact with from here on out.
And if you’ve made it this far into the article, then I honor you for that. Thank you for at least being this curious about leaning into this process that you would let these words wash over you. I don’t take your effort for granted. And whatever you do with this information from here on out, I honor that too.
I wish you the best of luck on your journey.
Dedicated to your success, and the expansion of your beautiful heart,
How are you planning to stop hating women? Share with us in comments.