There are some things in life that everyone loves to believe will never happen to them. For instance, everyone believes they are too smart to be in an abusive relationship or a toxic one. Everyone likes to believe that they are strong-willed and self-respecting enough to dump their partner when they see The Signs.
No, you won’t.
First, you won’t see the signs by yourself.
Secondly, even if you see them, you will convince yourself that there are justified reasons to them.
Thirdly, even if you reach the conclusion that there is something obviously wrong, you will find out that you are not willing to let go of the companionship that you have grown so used to and comfortable with — especially if you have been in it for too long.
Which is why, it is really great that you are here, because here is what: there is really nothing you can do about it. You just have to get past this and grow up stronger and smarter than you thought you were.
No shocker, right? A man who is there for temporary fix knows it in his heart and hence, will act accordingly. He will casually call you his friend — and if confronted about it, might pass it off as a mistake or a light-hearted joke. A man who is serious about you won’t do this. He will know how precious you are and will not step back from claiming you as his significant other.
A man with cold-feet will also avoid meeting your parents at almost any cost. He will not want to go through the pressure of being someone he knows he is not going to be — i.e. the dreaded son-in-law.
Similarly, he will also keep you from meeting his parents because, again, why go through something unnecessary?
Always listen to a man when he declares something. Always.
Believe him, that’s your only job. If a man tells you his setbacks as a person and a partner, listen to him. He is definitely not going to change his mind if he already told you that he is not looking for a serious relationship when you began. Believe him when you find yourself hopelessly fallen and he tells you he is not ready to take the leap.
Really. Being civil is one thing, but being too friendly is something else. A man who isn’t serious about you will knowingly maintain wide door policy hoping for better options to come along. On the same vein, never trust a man who is already in a comfortable relationship that he refuses to end. He is another one who is never going to be serious about you — and chances are he must have told you so in the beginning. Good thing we have already established that one should always listen when he is disclosing/declaring something.
You know it when you do. You are always the one making up plans. The one fixing everything between you. Although, don’t be fooled by the fantasy-plans — the ones where he vaguely promises you things or outings without really setting a sure date upon it. Those are specifically laid down to throw you off his trail if you have begun to grow suspicious of his seriousness for you.
Him never prioritizing you enough is never a good sign either. Especially when you are going around being the most flexible, wonderful girlfriend trying to make time and space for him in your schedule, plans or life.
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