6 Essential Qualities of the Happiest Relationships

qualities of happiest relationship

5. Integrating responsible self-care with care for the marriage.

What may be perhaps the greatest challenge of any marriage is that of simultaneously addressing and fulfilling one’s own needs without neglecting those of the relationship. Nearly all of the couples that we spoke with were adept at both of these aspects of their lives and tended to see them as so inextricably linked that there was no apparent conflict or even difference between the two.

They frequently tended to see their own well-being is inextricably linked to the health of their relationship and approached this responsibility with a sense of privilege, rather than a sense of duty or obligation.

Related: 12 Common Habits In Healthy Relationships Every Couple Swears By

6. Living in gratitude.

For most of these people, the glass is always half-full. They are fundamentally optimistic, and that sense of optimism generally spills over to their marriage, as well as to other relationships in their lives. It is important to note that many of them hadn’t always had a natural temperament towards optimism, but had cultivated it in the course of their marriage.

Many were influenced by an optimistic partner whose attitude supported them to cultivate a more positive worldview in their own lives.

Consequently, there was a strong tendency to feel and express gratitude to each other and to others on an ongoing basis. This tendency to live in gratitude becomes a self-reinforcing experience that over time seems to permeate one’s overall quality of life experience.

Those who are in the graduating classes ahead of us have a lot to offer from their vast life experience. We are wise when we heed their advice.

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Written by Linda & Charlie Bloom
6 Essential Qualities of the Happiest Relationships
6 Essential Qualities of the Happiest Relationships
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6 Essential Qualities of the Happiest Relationships
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Linda and Charlie Bloom

Linda Bloom, LCSW and Charlie Bloom, MSW have been trained as psychotherapists and relationship counselors and have worked with individuals, couples, groups, and organizations since 1975. They have lectured and taught at universities and learning institutes throughout the USA, including the Esalen Institute, the Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health, 1440 Multiversity, and many others.  They have taught seminars in many countries throughout the world. They have co-authored four books, 101 Things I Wish I Knew When I Got Married: Simple Lessons to Make Love Last, Secrets of Great Marriages: Real Truth From Real Couples About Lasting Love, Happily Ever After And 39 Other Myths About Love, and That Which Doesn't Kill Us: How One Couple Became Stronger at the Broken Places. They have been married since 1972 and are the parents of two adult children and three grandsons. Linda and Charlie live in Santa Cruz, California. Their website is www.bloomwork.comView Author posts