3) You lose balance when you’re around them
When I say off balance, I don’t mean head over heels in love off balance.
I mean you don’t feel like yourself when you’re with them.
When you lose your center and start doing things that contradict your own value system and gut feelings, you will certainly feel off balance.
You may feel like you are only doing this to please your partner and it’s a one of thing but once you start this habit of putting someone’s needs ahead of you at the expense of your own comfort, it gets really difficult to bounce back and stand up for yourself.
You will create a power dynamic wherein it would be very apparent for your partner that you are ok to give your power away and he can very easily manipulate you.
It is important to be true to yourself and your own values and walk our own path even if it means that you may lose people in the process.
There is no point in having a relationship where you lose yourself.
“The truth is, we tend to train people how we want to be treated. If others know you have wishy-washy boundaries then they are free to walk all over you; the results…you become a doormat. We have actually trained others to do this when we will allow people to wipe their muddy feet on us. After all, we are doormats.”
― David W. Earle LPC- Love is Not Enough
4) Your body rejects their energy
Our bodies and gut instincts are smarter than we know. If you feel a tension in your body or constricted feeling in your gut, when you are with someone, your body is rejecting their energy.
You may not have a logical reason but trust your gut instinct. Either really dig out this person and get to know their real motives or simply walk away.
Our bodies and guts have a way of picking energies and if you feel even slight discomfort or fear in someone’s presence, it is wise to listen to your own body and tread carefully.
5) They have a lot of skeletons in their closet
If someone comes to you with sob stories about how unfairly they were treated in their past, by their bosses, girlfriends or mother and looks for comfort in your loving arms, they really aren’t in love with you but only looking for a rescuer.
You are not here to rescue anyone or be their mother.
6) You feel like you’re on a roller coaster ride
Do you feel that you can’t predict his behavior? One day he calls you ten times a day and then forgets to check your text for the next five days and then again texts you showering his love and affection on you like nothing has happened.
This on and off attention can seem exciting and passion filled initially but it is exhausting and draining in the long run.
A healthy relationship seems secure, safe and stable and doesn’t keep you guessing.