The more space you both have, the more you’ll miss one another and have lots to talk about when you connect again. And it’ll set the course for a healthy marriage when the time comes.
Not all married couples prioritize alone time; 29% say they don’t have enough alone time or time for themselves. This is easily preventable if you take the time to carve out time independent of one another, so know that doing so now is a great relationship practice for down the road.
3. Stop Trying to Make Him Miss You
You’re trying too hard, lady.
Look, men aren’t stupid. We know when women are subtly (or not-so-subtly) trying to get our attention.
If, when you’re apart, you’re doing the following things, this isn’t how to make him miss you. It is, however, a good way to annoy him and even push him away. And it’s juvenile. You’re not 17. You can do better.
- Tagging him in photos on Facebook, even if he wasn’t with you when you took them
- Sending him a Snapchat every ten minutes to get his attention
- Texting his friends to see what they’re up to
- Posting pictures with other guys on Instagram to make him a little jealous
The best way to make him miss you is…
Wait for it…
To be absent. You’re not really absent if you’re popping up on social media or text every five seconds. When you’re apart, go away.
I mean that with love, my dear. But you don’t need to constantly pop up in his feed for him to think about you and make him miss you. The less you’re around, the more likely he is to reach out to get your attention.
But don’t just sit around with your arms crossed, willing him to miss you. Get a life. Find things to do. That way you’ll have much to talk about, and you won’t be sitting around, hoping he’ll text.
4. Move Slower Than He Wants
Set the slow pace for your relationship.
I know where you went wrong.
You didn’t take control of the pace of the relationship.
You didn’t let him miss you.
You gave all of yourself to him right from the start, and then there was nothing to miss. A lot of women assume that just because a guy really wants to keep seeing them, they should let him, that they should be as available as he wants them to be.
However, my advice is to put the brakes on.
Let him have space. Let him yearn for you a little bit because that space is going to allow you to get to know each other slowly, which ultimately is better for the foundation of a solid and committed relationship.
I’ve seen it happen far too often: couples spend every waking moment together from the start. They have sex soon. Then things fizzle within weeks, and nobody knows what happened.
I know what happened. They took things too fast and suddenly the entire relationship just burns up into flames.
On the other hand, controlling the speed of how things happen is completely in your hands, and it absolutely is one of the secrets to how to make him miss you. Maybe the first few weeks, you decide you’ll only see him on weekends, and never stay the night. Over time, you might have a sleepover every few weeks.
That can increase as you get closer, but always be prepared to have time off from one another, or go home after a date rather than crashing at his house.
Kelley Johnson, PhD, a clinical sexologist based in North Carolina, says to have the conversation about the speed of your relationship early:
“Talking about [your boundaries] early on and making sure your partner is on the same page and has an understanding of who you are is so important.”
Setting boundaries early keeps you from hurting his feelings later when you say you want some space, or want to give him some. But you’ll both benefit from it.
He’ll miss you, I guarantee.
5. Leave a Little Mystery in the Conversation
Being mysterious makes him want you more.
Now, there’s a reason why when we watch a trailer for a movie we can’t wait to watch the movie. Because we get, of course, a taste of what the movie is all about but we have no idea what the whole full picture is about. We certainly don’t know how it ends.