Being confident is not about becoming somebody else. Developing your self-confidence is all about being natural, being yourself, and being honest. Many people might tell you that you become more confident in becoming successful first. The more successful you are, the more confident you feel, right? Wrong. I see it the other way around.
The more confident you are, the more successful you become. Why? Because you are not afraid of failure anymore. You are not afraid of being judged or afraid of what other people think about you. The moment you truly reach success is the moment you are not afraid of who you are anymore.
Take a look at my next list on how to enhance your own self-confidence daily, and leave a comment if you have something valuable to share. Donโt fake it till you make it, embrace who you are and live a happy, honest life.
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Stop Caring What Other People Think
If you constantly care about external opinions, you will end up becoming what other people want you to be. You will slowly lose your identity, and soon, your behavior is going to oscillate depending on who you are hanging out with. Your own rules and own personality will get lost in the process, and you might find out that you are ashamed of your actions.
The only reason you will ever be afraid of your actions is if you are ashamed of them. And if you are not proud of your actions, you are not being yourself.
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Start Being Honest With Yourself
We are all predisposed to neediness. We are control freaks who, at the end of the day, seek peopleโs approval. Fortunately, you can start recognizing this type of behavior and start changing yourself. When you are honest, you have absolutely nothing to lose. The only thing that will change is how people perceive you. But if the above condition (1) is met, and you already stopped caring, does that really matter anymore?
Being honest is the best weapon to defend yourself. If you never lie, they will never have anything to hit you with, because you already recognized and accepted everything that you are. You have nothing to hide, you are accepting yourself. You are just an honest person having nothing to lose.
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Feel Uncomfortable
One of the best confidence coaches there are, Dan Munro believes that we achieve another sense of confidence once we get out of our comfort zones. If we explore the world that is around us and put ourselves in uncomfortable situations, we will eventually conquer our fears and anxieties.
For example, as a guy, approaching women is a challenging task. It takes a lot of courage and a developed sense of self-confidence (at least that is what people think). But when you think about it, all it takes is practice. If you start approaching women every single day โ in the metro, at work, at the gym โ you will get different replies from every single one, daily. One lady might be interested in you, while another might politely leave. The point is โ once you get out of your comfort zone and approach them regularly, you start realizing that you have nothing to lose anymore. You can either get a yes or a no when you ask them out, and thatโs it. Nothing bad happens. You get used to it.
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Build Your Own Values
A person without values lives a chaotic life. You have to know what you want from yourself at all times. If you hate lying and you are really upset when people do it, make honesty your number one value. Think about other values like assertiveness, respect, authenticity, or boldness. There are a lot of values that you can choose from.
Lorelai Andrews, CEO at UKBestessays, shares her opinion. โIf you never stopped to think about your values, you should definitely do it. Who are you, and what do you want in your life? What are your goals, and how do you plan to reach them? These are all questions you need to ask yourself as soon as you have a chance. Otherwise, you will constantly be ashamed of your actions, because youโll never know what you should or should not do.โ
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Act Shamelessly
If by now you figured out your values and understood how important being honest is, then this is the final step to achieving self-confidence: act shamelessly.
Acting shamelessly means opening the doors to the public. Owning your behavior and living by your values. Being shameless about who you truly are. Opening up to people, telling them how you feel, acknowledging whenever you are wrong. If you feel uncomfortable in a situation, say something. Donโt hide your feelings and more important, speak out for yourself.
Wrapping Up
Building self-confidence takes a lot of time commitment and willingness to expand your comfort zone. It means getting out of your shell and experimenting life. It means living fearlessly for the rest of your time and owning everything that you are. Your actions reflect your values, so once you have those setup, you should own every decision you take. Good luck!
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