Those of our kind who have ample financial resources do not have any intention of making repayment. Instead, we use this borrowing of the money as a bridge between you and I and as above it is all about keeping a hook into you.
When we promise to repay you, we will not do so. What we are telling you is that we want to create a method of ensuring you are connected to us and able to draw fuel from you.
3. I won’t hurt you
Of all the broken promises this is perhaps the one which does the most damage. We are actually telling you this: –
“I won’t hurt you as long as you comply with what I want.”
It just so happens that we always omit the last nine words. We regard you as our appliance, an extension of our will and you are expected to do what we want. Provide potent positive fuel, succumb to our demands, run around after us, say yes when we want yes and no when we want no but you must guess which is correct. We want you obedient, compliant and submissive.
Navigate your way through this maze successfully and you will not be hurt. Unfortunately, for you nobody is ever able to do this because you will always have to be hurt because we want fuel. You have to be hurt because no matter how hard you try you will always cause a criticism which will wound us and therefore we have to defend ourselves by lashing out and hurting you. You have to be hurt because there are even those of our kind, the malignant and the greater who delight in doing so.
The hurt will always visit you somehow.
4. I will be faithful
We cannot be faithful. We need fuel too much. Although most of it will come from you we need it from other sources as well and this will result in our infidelity. Infidelity comes in many forms, just as fuel does. To some it may be sharing long and intimate conversations, to others, it is a kiss, to others it is sexual touching and to others, it is full-blown sexual intercourse.
Our desire for fuel combined with our massive sense of entitlement and our failure to recognize boundaries means that we will be unfaithful. Add to that our lack of accountability, our failure to feel guilt or remorse and you stand no chance of ever ensuring that we remain faithful.
We say this because you want to hear it. This is most often used after we have been exposed as committing an act or acts of infidelity and we are concerned that you will leave us and thus take away our primary source of fuel when we have not secured a replacement yet. We will pledge that we will be faithful moving forward in an attempt to prevent you from causing a cessation to our supply of fuel. These are empty words. We will be unfaithful within the week, maybe not even that long, just so long as uttering such a promise stops you from going.
5. I will change
No, I won’t. Even if I could, which is highly unlikely, why should I when there is nothing wrong with me. Everything I do is necessary to ensure my survival and my remaining elevated and superior. Just because you and others do not like the way that I behave does not mean that I have to alter what I am.
I know however that you love to think that we can be cured of whatever ill it is that we suffer from. You want us to become better and different and naturally if this means we can get you to stay, do what we want and keep providing us with fuel we are content to tell you that we will change. We are experts at adopting false expressions of contrition as well to accompany this empty promise.
This vacant promise actually means
“I will carry on doing what I am doing and nobody will ever stop me.”
These are 5 false promises of the Narcissist. Could you relate it? Would you like to add more? Share your thoughts in comments below.
Written by H.G. Tudor
Originally appeared on Narcsite.com