10 Signs You Have A Toxic Mother-In-Law and How To Deal

10 Signs You Have A Toxic Mother-In-Law and How To Deal

10. She will pretend to care about you.

There will be days when she will be really nice to you (maybe because you have done something that she wanted you to do), and make you feel like a part of the family. She might get you something nice, or take your side in some matter, and you will feel that finally, you are going to have a healthy relationship with her. But, hold on.

In such situations, no matter what happens, never let your guard down; she is just fattening you up for slaughter. The moment she will see that you are being vulnerable and open, she will strike you where it hurts the most. The harsh and sad truth is that she will never consider you a part of the family, and will always be up to something or the other to make you feel unwanted, and harassed.

Here Are 8 Tips For Dealing With A Toxic Mother-In-Law

1. Think about why she treats you horribly.

Even if you understand why she treats you the way she does, her behavior will not change. But once you have an idea why she is being horrible to you, you will be able to tackle her better. Knowing how her mind works, will help you deal with her taunts, and insults in a more effective way.

And the more you understand her, the better you will be able to predict her moves. You might never be able to change her as a person, but what you can do is know how to navigate through her mind games and politics.

10 Signs You Have A Toxic Mother-In-Law and How To Deal
10 Signs You Have A Toxic Mother-In-Law and How To Deal

2. Try to practice detachment as much as you can.

Again, you might not be able to change her toxic ways, but what you can do is detach and distance yourself from her toxicity. The more you react to a narcissist like her, the more it will affect you. How she treats you has little to do with you, and everything to do with her. Keep that in mind, and never let her destroy your peace.

The moment you feel an attack coming, steel yourself and remove yourself from the situation. Don’t engage, don’t react, and most importantly, don’t get into the mud pit with her, because that is exactly what she wants.

3. Stay away from conflicts that might escalate very quickly.

Every time she passes an insensitive comment about you or behaves in a passive-aggressive manner, remember that she is simply trying to bait you and lure you into a fight with her. A toxic mother-in-law’s whole agenda is to pick fights with you all the time, twist the situation, and then portray herself as the victim.

Stay away from any fight that might escalate at the drop of a hat, and you will see how irritated and defeated she will be. Escalating conflicts are her way of destroying your image, and mental peace.

Related: 15 Things Manipulative People Do to Try to Control You

4. Identify and circumvent triggers.

Remember that you are a better person than her. You are the bigger person in this scenario, and never ever stoop down to her level. One of the best ways of handling a toxic mother-in-law is by identifying triggers and then avoiding them. Knowing every trigger will help you predict what is coming,

If she insults you in some way or the other every time you visit her, then reduce your visits or stop going over altogether. If she tries to dominate you in social situations, then stay away from her, and mingle with people on your own. If she is someone who hates it when you give your opinion, then don’t get into any kind of argument with her.

2 thoughts on “10 Signs You Have A Toxic Mother-In-Law and How To Deal”

  1. Thank you for sharing. A lot of what you put here has hit me. Everything you said has opened my eyes and I hopefully can stay calm and follow your wonderful direction.

  2. Thank you so much for this article. My mother-in-law is as malignant as they come, too many unfathomable horror stories I have of the last 15 years. I just learned about narcissistic behavior and realized that’s why I had no idea why she was doing all these horrible things to me. It’s so hard for others survivors to understand, because it’s a different type of relationship than that of a child, parent, spouse, etc.. I was able to check all your boxes 10x over. Thank you for writing the first piece of information regarding this topic, that I have really been able to find in 15 years, that is direct line with my situation. I feel less alone than I have in a long time – as well as assured and confident that I am finally acting accordingly to the circumstances. Thank you so very much!!!

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