Well, the ideal scenario is that we always talk kindly and respectfully to our partner but like we discussed real life is far from ideal scenarios.
We are all human and all of us lose our sh*t at some point or the other.
We all shout, rage, cry hysterically, roll eyes and throw tantrums when triggered.
Please don’t take your partner’s bad behavior personally and let it take you off course.
Asked to get intimate and got turned down?
Don’t take it personally and start yelling, whining or throwing tantrums. That’s not sexy at all.
When you get turned on, here are better options:
Ask again and this time be more seductive and inviting and see if it changes your partner’s mood. If it doesn’t work, then chill and go read a book, maybe.
There’s always the next time.
Ok, so if you enter into relationships hoping they would be always like a perfect fairy tale. Let me break the myth to you, neither is life perfect nor are relationships.
Relationships can be really messy.
Well, it is an ideal scenario, if things are 50-50 in your relationship, but in reality, sometimes your partner can get really soppy or you can get really triggered and it has to 90 -10 or 40- 60.
Expecting and tolerating unfairness is a part of growing up, cribbing about things being unfair is a trip back to childhood.
Asking is a mature way of getting your wants and needs met.
As a mature adult, you are expected to ask clearly for what you want.
If you are still living with a juvenile idea that your partner is a mind reader and will know everything that’s on your mind, you are going to end up being really disappointed because no one is really a psychic.
Don’t make asking for what you want into an ego thing that it makes you less than anybody.
Don’t think that asking for something reduces its values if I get a hug from my partner after I asked for it, is just as sweet as one that he gives me spontaneously.
Asking requires courage and ability to deal with yes and no with equal grace.
Do you hold a grudge against your partner for something he said to you 12 years ago?
Do you keep poking them by reminding them of their past mistakes?
Well, holding a grudge and bringing up past mistakes will really not solve any problem. It will only make you more bitter and resentful.
It’s better to forgive and live in the present; otherwise, you will miss out on the beautiful life that is unfolding for you right in front of your eyes.
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