It’s time to strike up the band and break out the champagne because on September 22nd Mercury retrograde is officially over. Say hallelujah! The planet Mercury goes “direct,” and your life officially returns back to normal. You can start humming the lyrics from Bobby McFerrin’s song, “Don’t Worry, Be Happy,” Just like Paul Revere, the famous American patriot, who on his midnight ride, (supposedly) warned everyone, “The British are coming!”—I warned you “Mercury retrograde was coming from August 30 to September 22.” In my recent Mercury retrograde article, I explained that this cosmic event was taking place over the past three weeks. During the retrograde period, the world went haywire, weird things happened, and your life was probably filled with communication problems you don’t usually encounter. In the cosmos, the planet Mercury rules all types of communications. This Mercury retrograde brought out more then its share of crazy news stories that typified the communication problems both people and politicians experienced. Here are a few examples of people who did not do well under the influence of this retrograde.
Mercury Retrograde News Stories
Rio de Janeiro, Aug. 30 (USA TODAY Sports) Olympic swimmer Ryan Lochte has been pilloried for his exaggerated tale of robbery in Rio. Mexico City, Sept. 1 Mexican President and Donald Trump have Twitter war over “Mexico not paying for the wall.”
New York, Sept 6 (Huffington Post) Matt Lauer Lets Donald Trump Get Away With Iraq War Lie.
Yahoo News, Sept. 7 Pilot accidentally flies to the entirely wrong country in colossal stuff-up. New York, Sept 9 (NY Daily News) Hillary Clinton says that 50% of Trump’s supporters are “deplorable.” Regardless of the problems you encountered during this retrograde, if you do some simple things when Mercury goes direct, you’ll derive huge benefit and make yourself or someone else very happy.
Five Ways to Make People Very Happy!
- You made your mother happy when you listened to her advice. Aren’t you glad you declined that job as Head Organizer for Trump!” Now you can accept a job opportunity with a real future.
During the retrograde, you may have had some confusion about whether to accept a promotional opportunity or a new job offer. However, when Mercury goes direct those doubts will be gone. The fog lifts and your vision is 20/20. You’re now able to evaluate the good, bad and the ugly of any employment opportunity and chose the one that’s right for you. It’s also a positive time to begin a new position because you’ll be communicating clearly without the confusion that causes misunderstandings or bad first impressions.
- Be grateful you weren’t fired after placing either of these two ideas in the company suggestion box: the one for “Flavored bullets so people can commit suicide with one of five tasty choices.” Or your new event idea for the annual company picnic: “Having a Xanax scavenger hunt where everything on the list must be stolen.”
Admit to co-workers that your recent promotional ideas were pretty dumb. Let them know that you understand why they burned your picture in effigy in the company lunchroom as a throng of employees loudly cheered, clapped, and chanted, “What a doofus.”
- Immediately schedule an appointment to see your hair stylist. . .Please! During the retrograde, you changed your hairdo. What a mistake! It’s clear now that the Donald Trump “comb-over” look wasn’t right for you. Now that Mercury is direct, it’s time to have your hair stylist do a make over and undo the damage, and stop the ridicule you’ve endured from your family and friends. It’s time to “make this face great again.”
Before the retrograde began, you may have been evaluating areas of your life where you needed to make decisions. Perhaps, it was inconvenient to delay making those decisions, waiting for the three weeks of the retrograde to pass. (That’s why you decided to change your hairstyle during the retrograde. Bad move!) But as the direct period begins, you’ll discover mistakes you might have made and learn some useful information you didn’t know. With these facts in hand, you’ll be ready to make the right buying decision to purchase that expensive car or home, begin a new project with greater confidence of success, more competently select a new attorney for estate planning or a plastic surgeon for your cosmetic surgery.
- Return your girlfriend’s talking-parrot, Freddy (who you swore flew out the window during the week you were house-sitting for her). Now is an excellent time to find items you’ve lost (even a parrot, who screams, “Loser” each time he sees you.)
The direct period is a time to find those things that were lost (or, that you had a hand in losing). Keep in mind, that we all lose things of value, even when Mercury is not retrograde. However, during the retrograde, when people are especially careless and mistake-prone, there is a higher propensity to lose important items such as money, clothes, rings or other valuables (or, even a parrot). The direct period is a very fortunate time to find, not only items that you’ve lost during the retrograde, but valuables you’ve lost over the years. Make a list of any items you’ve lost recently, or even months, or years ago. Think back to when and where you lost them. Mentally, your mind is especially sharp now, allowing you to recall details you had long forgotten. You’ll think of a new place you’ve never looked before and magically, your lost item will be there. Or, you may suddenly remember someone you should contact who could help you recover what you’ve lost.
- Apologize for what you said about your mother-in-law. Let your wife know that you mis-spoke when you referred to her as, “That nosy b*tch!”
Resolve misunderstandings that have occurred. We all make mistakes in the way we communicate with others. Unfortunately, we tend to make a lot of them during the retrograde period. But what separates the men from the boys and the girls from the women are the way we clean them up, when we make them. If you’ve had an argument at work with a colleague or boss, or had a big fight with a loved one, or called a loved one’s mother a harsh name, Mercury direct is the ideal time to discuss what’s upset you, apologize or forgive someone. You’ll have the mental clarity to express yourself appropriately and reach a new understanding that will resolve your upset and create a more harmonious relationship. Mercury retrograde is a time to slow down, reflect and re-evaluate all your plans and projects. Re-consider your ideas and what you’ve learned. If you’ve consciously done this – you’re now more conscious of changes you can make to improve it. To help you with this task, make a list of people you’ve had questions about, projects you considered undertaking, and activities you were contemplating. Ask yourself: what have you learned about them that you didn’t know three weeks ago? This new knowledge will help you make needed changes and more successful decisions. Take advantage of this period of sanity when the world is no longer quite as crazy, that is, until December 19, 2016 when the next Mercury retrograde begins. Until then, get busy; you have some things to do to make people very happy.
If you want to know if you were born with Mercury Retrograde; and how the planets in your horoscope may be bringing changes to your life, go to the Free Transit Calculator and enter your birth date. And, if you’re curious to learn what your Horoscope says will be happening this year in such areas as your love relationships, and marriage prospects, as well as career, investments and health: Order your customized Report: Your Horoscope & Future in 2016-17.
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