Love is a fickle thing between teenagers, where one day he’s God’s gift to man and the next all you want is his death. I’ve had an experience or two in my few years with love, or what I thought to be love, and have this to say about it.

There is a string between any two people’s hearts that exists in limbo, where neither knows it is there. When one heart beats out of rhythm, as to say, it beats faster, the string begins to pull the two hearts closer together. Eventually, both people become accustomed to this beautiful beat and notice in themselves that they actually enjoy it. However, there will always be a segment between the two hearts in the string, for the hearts are too fragile to meet halfway. This segment is comprised of sexuality, inclusivity, attraction and physicality. Upon the journey, love is the driving force for 99% of the coming together of the two hearts. Sadly, the relations between the two are solely based upon that 1% we find in the middle. Most of the time, those four characteristics are what blind two wonderful souls from seeing their potential of being together.

The two hearts will eventually meet the strongest point of the string where one heart brushes slightly against the other. This is where the one person shares their feelings. It is here that the hearts either collide at light speed, where their accumulated fragility explodes into a darkness that leaves both parties broken and unknown to each other, or they slowly start to beat at the same rhythm and move into a motion of unbreakable, substantial connection. If the former takes place, the two hearts regroup their pieces and share them, gluing them in place like a mosaic. The latter, the two hearts remain in semi-harmony, as one wrong move could result in cataclysm. And this is all wonderful and beautiful, but what if you, like me, don’t love with this figment of imagination and choose the sterling soul instead?

As my heart is beyond repair, it is my soul that drives the forces in the string. It does not beat as the heart does; it merely toes the line and makes tiny progress each day. The being on the other side does not realize anything is happening besides the tiny pulses the soul produces when it feels anger, sorrow or joy; these are synonymous with the emotions they are tied to, and often pulsate when I am around the other being in reality. I’ll have an overwhelming fit of passion and the person will be none the wiser, whilst the soul quickly recoils as to hide that anything actually happened. Since there is no movement in the string, the other being doesn’t move closer, so the soul travels double the journey as the heart had to in order to reach equilibrium. When the soul does reach the other side, its aura detonates in the emotion it has been harboring the whole time and destroys anything in the vicinity. If that happens to be a fragile heart, it is sent to oblivion with nothing to glue it back together. This is because once the soul has had its sweet release, it travels back down the string to its own corner because whatever it was supposed to meet couldn’t take what it was dishing out. This journey is slow and painful for the soul because it realizes that nothing wants it because it does too good a job of bottling everything up only to break things in the end. Upon arrival, it stops and faces the empty string, awaiting another “victim.”

The heart is less destructive in delivering its message, but that message may very well be misconstrued and rather nonsensical. The soul, however, delivers the most lethal message that only an adjoining soul could withstand, and so my loneliness is explained. In essence, the soul does not take kindly to mediocrity, as seen by the heart; it does more work and shows more passion than the heart is willing to, and doesn’t destroy itself to rebuild, rebuild, rebuild. The soul’s focus is that of power, individuality and purity, culminating in a cold-appearing, easily misunderstood being. The soul proudly uses its energies in the most constructive of manners, whereas the heart is lazy and adapted in a deadly fashion. Sinking into darkness, the heart does not possess the light on its own to see through the pain, where the soul takes the hurt in and learns from it. And yet we still choose to love with a bomb and not the detonator.

Set off on a journey of love with your heart and you need to remember your brain as not to become stupid. Set off on a journey of love with your soul and you have all the brain you’ll ever need. If life is all about choices, make the right ones when it comes to something as dangerously magical as love.

Written by Nicholas Thompson