There is a different kind of love; a love that isn’t the happy kind, resulting in the joining of two people; the fusing of two lives into one; a love that gives you life.
Contrary to popular belief, or fantasy embedded into us at an early age – sometimes love doesn’t conquer all. There is a love that a person will feel when he or she can never, and will never, be able to be with that certain someone. It’s a darker love; a kind of love that happens when two flames combust, causing fireworks that leave you with burns to heal over time – but the scars of it never fade.
It’s odd to think that something so beautiful can also be the most horrid thing we’ve ever come face-to-face with. Some people cannot, and will not ever end up together, no matter how much they love each other. It’s a sad truth – but a truth, nonetheless.
Some people aren’t ready to be happy or to be loved, and you meet them at the wrong time – at an unfortunate time. Not all people are able to handle showing you their dark bits; their gory bits. And no matter how much you love their demons, they cannot accept that they are worthy of this kind of love.
Some people run from love. With real love, comes the risk of pain; true heartache. The kind of pain that can crush your gut and eat your soul, leaving you gasping for air.
Love can get too intense, too real – it’s the closest thing to perfection that exists in the world; the only thing that can easily and comfortably encompass both good and evil; beautiful and ugly.
This intensity may cause people to have poor judgment, like lies we told or things we said. Because there are people who cannot handle real love, it makes them terrified and confused. Whatever happened in their past has crutched them; creating a broken part of themselves – a part that isn’t able to allow or accept love.
The fact is, love is not enough.
Some people have habits or beliefs that make it impossible to be a team with the person who they love. Some people are broken; their thinking habits and tendencies make them very incompatible with the person they love.
Some people are self-destructive and no matter how great your love with them is, that love is not enough. Because remember: love isn’t rational.
Sometimes there are other reasons why two people cannot and will not ever be together. Sometimes a person cannot forgive and forget. Because love is as intense an emotion as one gets, it occasionally leads us to make poor choices – choices that hurt the ones who we love the most.
When those choices are made, love can scar, cutting deeply. The pain isn’t easily or willfully forgotten. When you hurt the person you love enough, they won’t come back to you. And because you still love them, you hate yourself and can’t forgive yourself for sabotaging it.
Relationships are built on trust and sometimes that trust is shattered. The grueling part is that you still love each other, and probably always will. The scars that will never heal is something that you both have to live with. Why? Because there really isn’t any other choice.
Love will never be governed by rationality, and no matter how dark and sad it ended up being, it’s still the closest thing to a flawless whole that you have been a part of. After some time, your heart will slowly reform, coming back stronger.
Time will pass and the darkness will eventually subside. After all, darkness is, in reality, the absence of light. New light will come, and you’ll wait in hopes that new love can take the place of the old – which it can.
But that doesn’t mean you will ever stop loving each other. Some people will love each other until the day they die, spending the majority of their lives apart. And so it is. The gory side of love.
Written by Anna Bashedly